Friday, July 30, 2010

Where could you be upping your integrity?


Posted by Margie Warrell

It’s what we look for in our leaders. What we hope for in our politicians. What we expect from our spouse and what we struggle with throughout our life. Integrity.

What does it mean to you? Have you thought about it? I know when I speak to different people everyone has their own idea of what it means. . . from being honest in your business dealings to not cheating on your tax return (or your spouse!). But integrity goes way beyond being a good law-abiding citizen. At its core, integrity is about having alignment between what you know is the right thing to do and what you are doing; between who you aspire to be, and who you are being. I’m all about people thinking big in life. However, unless your actions are backed by a solid foundation of integrity, they will fail to produce the results you really want. Of course being the infallible human beings that we are, we often slip up. We tell a lie or fail to tell the truth, we make a mistake and try to cover it up, we treat someone poorly, we stay silent when we see someone else treated poorly. . . ahh, if only it were easy to always live with integrity. Needless to say, I’m not here to make you feel bad about those times you sell out or be dishonest (with yourself or others). Rather I just want to challenge you to address any areas of your life in which integrity might be. . . well. . .compromised. It could be:


  • Speaking up about an issue that has upset you because you know you owe it to yourself and to the person to get the issue off your chest and on the table

  • Giving someone the constructive feedback they need to improve their performance, even though it makes you uncomfortable to do so

  • Saying no to a commitment that is keeping you from spending the time with your family that you value so highly

  • Sorting out your finances which you have neglected for a long time and creating a plan to pay back money you owe to others

  • Cutting back on the amount of paper products you use or getting a filter on your water tap rather than consuming so many plastic bottles of water because you know it’s damaging to the environment

  • Apologizing to someone to whom, intentionally or not, you caused hurt or simply taking responsibility for something you did (or failed to do!)

  • Deciding you are no longer going to speak badly about people because you just don’t want to be someone who does that


Are you ready to give up the payoffs?
The hardest part of restoring (and keeping) integrity is letting go of the payoff you’ve been getting from behaving that way in the first place. Such payoffs include (but are far from limited to):

  • An absence of confrontation or avoidance of some unpleasant consequence

  • Convenience or financial gain

  • Feeling victimized or just having an excuse to avoid change

  • Ego gratification, social kudos or professional recognition


No one enjoys admitting they’ve been selling out, deceitful or cutting corners which is why living with integrity (and restoring it) requires ongoing self reflection, brutal honesty, humility and (last but not least) courage. So, I guess you might be wondering, why should I bother?

Not living with integrity costs you
During my teens I used to justify shoplifting things like lipstick with excuses like, “I’m poor and they won’t notice one lipstick,” and, “I know lots of people do this so why shouldn’t I?” Over time I came to realize it wasn’t about whether I would get caught or not, nor whether the store could afford it, it was simply that it was wrong and despite all my justifications, deep down I knew my biggest act of deceit was with myself. By failing to act with integrity I was holding myself back and undermining my own sense of self-worth. Intuitively I just knew that unless I cleaned up my act, I wouldn’t be able to enjoy the success and contentment in life I wanted and would be plagued by shame and guilt.

Shakespeare wrote, “To thine own self be true” for a reason. Psychologists have coined the term “cognitive dissonance” to describe the inner conflict that results when there is discord between our behavior and beliefs. In order to quiet the dogfight going on in their heads most people come up with all sorts of justifications for their actions: “everyone else is doing it,” “If I didn’t, someone else would,” “People take advantage of me so why shouldn’t I do it back?” and the list goes on. Despite their many reasons (aka excuses) they are still left with an unpleasant gnawing that eats away at their self-esteem and peace of mind. When the gnawing grows too intense, people come up with all sorts of creative ways to numb the pain and distract themselves from their unease. But still. . . it persists.

Restoring your sense of integrity will require giving up some of the payoffs you’ve become attached to. There’s no other way around it. Sorry. But the good news is that as you begin to clean up your act you will feel a whole new level of energy, self-worth and personal power.

So, what is stopping you from feeling 100% good about how you are operating in the world? Perhaps you’ve already have had a flash in your mind about an area of your life in which you don’t feel ‘right,’ where there’s an inconsistency between who you want to be and who you are being. If this is the case, then just know that you had that flash for a reason. It jumped in to your mind because, at your core level of being, you yearn to feel whole. Heed that voice! My book, Find Your Courage, has a great exercise called the Personal Integrity Audit. Integrity is about doing what’s right, not what’s convenient and yes, sometimes integrity compels you to go out on a limb. . . but hey, that’s where the best fruit are! Until next time, honor yourself by doing what you know is right. . . however inconvenient.

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Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Attitude is Everything!


by Jim Rohn

The process of human change begins within us. We all have tremendous potential. We all desire good results from our efforts. Most of us are willing to work hard and to pay the price that success and happiness demand.

Each of us has the ability to put our unique human potential into action and to acquire a desired result. But the one thing that determines the level of our potential, that produces the intensity of our activity, and that predicts the quality of the result we receive is our attitude.

Attitude determines how much of the future we are allowed to see. It decides the size of our dreams and influences our determination when we are faced with new challenges. No other person on earth has dominion over our attitude. People can affect our attitude by teaching us poor thinking habits or unintentionally misinforming us or providing us with negative sources of influence, but no one can control our attitude unless we voluntarily surrender that control.

No one else "makes us angry." We make ourselves angry when we surrender control of our attitude. What someone else may have done is irrelevant. We choose, not they. They merely put our attitude to a test. If we select a volatile attitude by becoming hostile, angry, jealous or suspicious, then we have failed the test. If we condemn ourselves by believing that we are unworthy, then again, we have failed the test.

If we care at all about ourselves, then we must accept full responsibility for our own feelings. We must learn to guard against those feelings that have the capacity to lead our attitude down the wrong path and to strengthen those feelings that can lead us confidently into a better future.

If we want to receive the rewards the future holds in trust for us, then we must exercise the most important choice given to us as members of the human race by maintaining total dominion over our attitude. Our attitude is an asset, a treasure of great value, which must be protected accordingly. Beware of the vandals and thieves among us who would injure our positive attitude or seek to steal it away.

Having the right attitude is one of the basics that success requires. The combination of a sound personal philosophy and a positive attitude about ourselves and the world around us gives us an inner strength and a firm resolve that influences all the other areas of our existence.

To Your Success, Jim

For more than 40 years, Jim Rohn honed his craft like a skilled artist helping people the world over sculpt life strategies that have expanded their imagination of what is possible. Those who had the privilege of hearing him speak can attest to the elegance and common sense of his material. It is no coincidence, then, that he is widely regarded as one of the most influential thinkers of our time, and thought of by many as a national treasure. Jim authored countless books and audio and video programs, and helped motivate and shape an entire generation of personal-development trainers and hundreds of executives from America's top corporations.

Jim Rohn focused on the fundamentals of human behavior that most affect personal and business performance. His is the standard to which those who seek to teach and inspire others are compared. He possessed the unique ability to bring extraordinary insights to ordinary principles and events, and the combination of his substance and style captures the imagination of those who hear or read his words.

Jim shared his message with more than 6,000 audiences and over 5 million people all over the world. He received numerous industry awards including the coveted National Speakers Association CPAE Award and the Master of Influence Award. Jim's philosophies and influence continue to have worldwide impact.He was truly a Full Spectrum Leader

www.jimrohn.com

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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Lessons from Lisa!


by Lisa Cypers Kamen

When we decide to open our eyes and be fully awake, we realize that much of the suffering is a self-created illusion. If we can trick ourselves into being the victim of our own misery, then surely we can just as easily volunteer for self-determined joy. ~Lisa Cypers Kamen

Here are a few of the best lessons I can happily share:

1. Life is tough:

Agreed, life is filled with trials and tribulations. To say one is happy all the time is a lie. To know happiness is available at any time is a truth. Happiness will not wait for us. Happiness will not invite us to the party. We must invite ourselves to say, "yes", diving deeply and happily into life...all of it...the ups, downs, twists and turns of our miraculous journey.

Happiness exists in tandem with adversity. Happiness waits in all the nooks and crannies to be embraced and celebrated ...ready at any moment. True and lasting joy emanates from thoughts, feelings, perceptions, actions and choices supported by positive self-esteem that oozes worthiness.

2. Nobody can tell us what makes us happy:

Society often dictates what we falsely believe creates happiness. Financial success, material wealth, finding the right partner and being part of the right group/club are some examples of external momentary happiness and amusement. Funny how mass media marketing attempts to tell and sell us that happiness can be found in a particular brand of meal, soda, car, etc...if they could only drive home the point of where the joy truly resides, most of us would have more money and less aggravation in pursuing it.

3. Getting hung up on what others do and say really impedes our happiness:

Consider turning the screws of your mind a quarter of an inch to change your perspective on a few vital things. Then head out into the world keeping your eyes open looking for the joy in the ordinary moments. Holy cow! You will find some...everywhere you look. It is inescapable. It is not always easy to see. Firstly, set aside judgment. Secondly, avoid expectation. Lastly, completely relinquish any anger for the things you cannot control locally and globally. After all that said and done; voila there it is, happiness...like a beacon of light waiting to be embraced.

4. Creating happiness requires a little focus:

I may not always be happy. Yet, I strive with every step I take and every move I make to approach life with positive intention, grace and an abundance of humor. I am not reliant on the outcome; just the moment. Being in the moment gives me full control of my thoughts, feelings and actions...hence my happiness. Yesterday is history, tomorrow a dream but the present is a precious gift.

This is not a 100% foolproof system. It is a goal to which I wholeheartedly aspire. Life is filled with bad days, sadness and adversity. Living now as if it were the only certain commodity creates mindful awareness and a deeper understanding of my power (both positive and negative).

5. Happiness is an inside job:

Happiness resides inside on a deeply soulful level. It cannot be bought, sold or traded. It is a choice we each must make consciously or unconsciously when we awaken each day. How are we going to be with our self? How are we going to show up in the world?

Lisa is life coach, teacher, designer, author, speaker and the documentary filmmaker of H-Factor...Where Is Your Heart?.

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Friday, July 23, 2010

The Words Do Matter!


Posted by Kevin Eikenberry

Air Canada Flight 154

I was boarding a flight in Edmonton, Alberta, bound for Toronto after a long day. As I handed my boarding pass to the Air Canada gate agent, I asked her if she was having a good day. Her response has been in my mind for nearly two weeks. She looked at me, smiled, and said, “All the better for you asking me, thanks.”

As I literally skipped down the jetway, I smiled. I have asked hundreds of people if they are having a good day. Never have I received that response. I’ve heard, “It’s ok.”, “No not really,” and “Fine, thanks.” But never, until now, have I heard “All the better for you asking me, thanks.”

Her response was gracious and warm. It wowed me as a Customer – giving me a very positive experience with Air Canada (even before I was on the plane!) More importantly, it made me feel special as a human being. Perhaps she was taught to say this by a parent at a young age and it was an automatic response. Even if this were true, her genuine response makes that irrelevant. What would have been a normal flight was changed by eight words – eight words I am sure I will never forget.

The Internet Essay

Recently I read an essay from one of my favorite writers. Scott Ringwelski writes an essay each week called Positive Pause. Last week’s issue starts . . .

“ No Problem…actually is.

‘ No problem.’ It seems natural, easy going, off the cuff, casual.

It’s a throwaway line for a disposable world.

However, how does your throwaway line and casual attitude translate to those you say it to?”

Scott goes on to say that the two words are actually two negatives, no and problem. Through a wonderful personal story he relates that rather than answering a request with “no problem,” it would be much more meaningful and powerful to say “It would be my pleasure.” Scott knows, as does my Edmonton friend, that choosing these words can make a huge difference.

Rhea

A few hours ago my step mother passed away. While there are many ways she blessed my life and there will be many things I will remember about her, the thing that strikes me now is one of her favorite phrases. “Terrific!” Ask Rhea how she was, and she, more often than not, would say “Terrific!” Even over the last few months when she was very ill. When you saw her, or spoke to her on the phone, if you asked how she was, she would say, “Terrific!”

Certainly in these last few months she hasn’t always been terrific, at least by most people’s standards. Her optimistic reply though, always lifted my day – even if I were calling to try and lift hers.

The Common Thread

In all of these cases, the words chosen by people have made a positive difference to those around them. As a consultant if I think about these word choices, I could easily make a case that using these phrases would be powerful in terms of Customer Service, and internal communications.

Most importantly though is that choosing these words transforms the people who say the words. Think about my Air Canada friend saying, “All the better for you asking me, thanks!”, or anyone saying “It’s been a pleasure,” or “Terrific!” These phrases recast our thinking and our self talk in a more positive, focused, and accountable way. Indeed, these words can make a big difference in the lives of others, and in our lives as well.

The words do matter. To everyone.

Kevin Eikenberry is the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group (KevinEikenberry.com) and author of Vantagepoints on Learning and Life. To read more stories like the one above or order your copy of the book visit http://www.vantagepoints.net or contact Kevin at (317) 387-1424 or toll free 888.LEARNER.

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Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Ten Commandments of Courage


By Margie Warrell

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. — Ana├»s Nin

I. Trust Yourself. No matter what happens, you can handle it. You are capable of more than you think you are. Really!

II. Question Assumptions. Don’t hang on to beliefs that no longer serve you. The only limits you have are those you’ve convinced yourself of. Assumptions are the death of possibilities.

III. Do What’s Right. Be true to yourself above everything else…however inconvenient or difficult. Integrity is the only path upon which you’ll never get lost.

IV. Stop Complaining. You can’t solve your problems by whining about them. Focus your energy on what you want, not on what you don’t; on what you can do, not on what you can’t.

V. Think Bigger. Refuse to settle for mediocrity. Set your sights high and know that if you can dream it, you can do it. All great accomplishments first begin in the imagination.

VI. Resist Conformity. Don’t let others’ opinions run your life and surrender to conformity. Express your individuality. Be your own person. Forge your own path.

VII. Speak Up. You get what you tolerate. If there’s something you really want to say, chances are someone really needs to hear it. Be courageous in your conversations.

VIII. Don’t Quit. Success demands perseverance. Adversity builds resilience. Setbacks are merely opportunities to show the universe what you’re made of. Press on.

IX. Say No. Say no to the good to make room for the great. Refuse to succumb to people-pleasing at the expense of your own sanity and fulfillment.

X. Take Action. Life rewards those who take action in the presence of their fear and refuse to give in to self-doubt . Nothing great has ever been achieved without an element of risk. So feel your fear and do it anyway! Fortune favors the bold.

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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Truth About Perserverance and Success!


Posted by Royane Real

If you really want to be successful, you probably spend a lot of time reading motivational books and articles. You want to know what qualities are required for success.

When we read about the tools required to achieve success, very often we are told that if we really want to be successful, we must have persistence.

Persistence is the quality of never giving up when we encounter challenges. Of holding on to our dream. Of refusing to be discouraged no matter what the odds, no matter what happens.

And when you read the life stories of very successful people, they will often tell you about all the hardships they encountered along the way. They will tell you about the discouragement they occasionally felt when they encountered failure, and about all the people who laughed at them along the way.

And then they will often tell you that the reason they are successful today is because they were persistent. They persevered in chasing their dream, no matter what happened.

So if you have been facing a bit of discouragement while you pursue your dream, reading these success gurus can give you the boost you need to keep on doing what you’ve been doing. After all, persistence is the key to success.

Almost everyone says so.

And all those people who encourage you to be persistent are wrong!

Persistence can lead to certain failure if you do not apply persistence in the right way.

Let me explain what these people are leaving out when they tell you to be persistent.

Every day as I drive to work in the city where I live, I always see a middle-aged blonde woman who paces back and forth on the sidewalk in front of a big government building. She is always carrying a big protest sign. She smiles and waves at all the cars that pass.

I’m not sure exactly what her sign says because the words don’t really make any sense.

There seems to be something about an injustice that happened to her when her husband’s pension was divided up during their divorce. And there’s a few comments about a government conspiracy to cover up the injustice that was done to her. I guess what she’s trying to accomplish with her protest is she’s trying to get this divorce decision changed.

Every day, no matter what the weather, this woman comes out to walk back and forth for two hours in front of this government building and wave at all the people. Her smile never fails.

After the first two hours of protesting are up, she goes to another place downtown. She spends another two hours walking back and forth, smiling and waving, in front of a different building a few blocks away.

She has been doing this every day for at least seventeen years.

She is certainly persistent.

All that persistence and dedication for so many years does not seem to be having any effect, but she does not seem to notice.

If seventeen years of her walking back and forth carrying this sign hasn’t had any effect, I don’t think that one more day of walking with this sign is going to change the outcome of her divorce. But she is persistent in continuing her protest.

Probably every big city has a few people like this woman, people you can see standing on the sidewalk. People who spends years holding some sign that doesn’t make sense.

These people can teach us all about the real value of perserverence and persistence.

These people are certainly very persistent, but usually they are not successful.

When success gurus tell us that persistence is an important quality on the road to success, they are often leaving out something important.

When successful people tell you that they got to where they are today because they were persistent, they are actually leaving out part of the story. A very important part of the story.

And the part that they are leaving out is this: They forget to tell you that before they were persistent, they had a goal, and they had a plan on how to get there.

And all along the way, after every step they took, they stepped back to evaluate the results to see if the results they were getting were the results they wanted. And if they weren’t getting the results they wanted, then they would change the steps they took, and try something different, until they found a method that worked for them.

These successful people did have persistence, but they were only persistent about holding on to their vision.

They were never persistent about the method they took to get to their goal.

All along the way, they were prepared to be very flexible and experiment to see what techniques and strategies worked best to get where they wanted to go.

Why do so many successful people leave out this important detail when they tell us the secrets to their success? Why do they so often neglect to mention that if a strategy wasn’t working, they abandoned it quickly and moved on to another strategy?

I don’t think that successful people deliberately leave out this key information because they don’t want us to be successful.

I think that successful people often leave out this key detail because they assume it’s very obvious to everyone already. They assume that everyone already knows that you test each step of what you are doing to see whether it’s working or not. And if it’s not working, you change it. And you keep trying new approaches til you get something that works, something that gets you closer to the result you want.

People who admire persistence often use the example of Thomas Edison who kept trying to produce an electrical light bulb even after ten thousand failed attempts.

But people often forget that while Thomas Edison was persistent in believing in his goal, he was not persistent in the way he tried to achieve it. Thomas Edison did not repeat the same experiment over and over again ten thousand times.

Thomas Edison performed about ten thousand different experiments on his way to trying to find a practical electrical light bulb.

Every time he tried an experiment to produce an electric light bulb, he then stepped back and took some time to evaluate the results. He figured out what was working and what wasn’t working. Then he would try something different the next time. And he would keep track of the results.

So, remember this crucial difference the next time someone tries to tell you that persistence is the key to success.

Without taking some time to evaluate whether or not what you do is actually working, you can be persistent for years, and not achieve the goals you want.

So, if you want to be successful, be sure to hold on to your dream, but remember to check frequently whether the actions you are taking are getting you closer to your goals.

This piece was written by Royane Real, author of several self improvement books available at her website, including "How You Can Be Smarter – Use Your Brain to Learn Faster, Remember Better and Be More Creative" If you would like to learn how to boost your brain power, download it today at http://www.royanereal.com



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Tuesday, July 20, 2010

A Better Life...Only a DECISION Away!

One single, "mental move" has the power to create incredible success...



by Bob Proctor

There is a single mental move you can make which, in a millisecond, will solve enormous problems for you. It has the potential to improve almost any personal or business situation you will ever encounter, and it could literally propel you down the path to incredible success. We have a name for this magic mental activity ... it is called DECISION.

Decisions or the lack of them are responsible for the breaking or making of many a career. Individuals who have become very proficient at making decisions, without being influenced by the opinions of others, are the same people whose annual incomes fall into the six and seven figure category.

However, it's not just your income that is affected by decisions; your whole life is dominated by this power. The health of your mind and body, the well-being of your family, your social life, the type of relationships you develop … all are dependent upon your ability to make sound decisions.

So, how is a person expected to develop this mental ability? Quite simply, as the commercial says, "Just do it." Decision making brings order to your mind, and of course, this order is then reflected in your objective world ... your results.

Indecision sets up internal conflicts that can, without warning, escalate into all out mental and emotional wars. Psychiatrists have a name to describe these internal wars - ambivalence. My Oxford Dictionary tells me that ambivalence is the co-existence in one person of opposite feelings toward the same objective.

You do not require a doctorate degree in psychiatry to understand that you are going to have difficulty in your life by permitting your mind to remain in an ambivalent state for any period of time. The person who does permit it to exist will become very despondent and virtually incapable of any type of productive activity. It is obvious that anyone who finds themselves in such a mental state is not living; at best, they are merely existing. A decision or a series of decisions would change everything.

A very basic law of the universe is "create or disintegrate". Indecision causes disintegration. How often have you heard a person say, "I don't know what to do." How often have you heard yourself say, "What should I do?" Think about some of the indecisive feelings you and virtually everyone on this planet experience from time to time. Love them; leave them. Quit, stay. Do it, don't do it. Buy it, don't buy it. Tell them, don't tell them.

Everyone, on occasion, has experienced these feelings of ambivalence. If it happens to you frequently, decide right now to stop it. The cause of ambivalence is indecision, but we must keep in mind that the truth is not always in the appearance of things. Indecision is a cause of ambivalence, however it is a secondary cause, it is not the primary cause. I have been studying the behavior of people who have become very proficient at making decisions for over a quarter century. They all have one thing in common. They have a very strong self image, a high degree of self-esteem. They may be as different as night is to day in numerous other respects, but they certainly possess confidence. Low self-esteem or a lack of confidence is the real culprit here. Decision makers are not afraid of making an error. If and when they make an error in their decision, or fail at something, they have the ability to shrug it off. They learn from the experience but they will never submit to the failure.

There is one cardinal rule with respect to decision making: decide right where you are with whatever you've got. This is precisely why most people never master this important attribute. They permit their resources to dictate if and when a decision will or can be made. When John Kennedy asked Wernher Von Braun what it would take to build a rocket that would carry a man to the moon and return him safely to earth, his answer was simple and direct. "The will to do it." President Kennedy never asked if it was possible. He never asked if they could afford it or any one of a thousand other questions, all of which would have ... at that time ... been valid questions.

President Kennedy made a decision ... he said, we will put a man on the moon and return him safely to earth before the end of the decade. The fact that it had never been done before in all the hundreds of thousands of years of human history was not even a consideration. He DECIDED where he was with what he had. The objective was accomplished in his mind the second he made the decision. It was only a matter of time ... which is governed by natural law, before the goal was manifested in form for the whole world to see.

The greatest stumbling block you will encounter when making important decisions in your life is circumstance. We let circumstance get us off the hook when we should be giving it everything we've got. More dreams are shattered and goals lost because of circumstance than any other single factor.

Let's consider money with respect to our decision making process. You should never let the lack of funds determine whether you will or will not do something. Think about it for a moment. When you decided to buy your first home, did you just happen to have a couple hundred thousand dollars sitting in the bank? I don't think so, I know I didn't. But, the minute you made the decision to buy the home, the money seemed to appear - just like unadulterated magic. Somehow you came up with the down payment; you may have had to scrimp and save every extra penny … but you did it. And if you were honest with yourself, you probably had enough money to buy new curtains and a bevy of other things for the new home. The minute you make the decision to do something, you will attract to you all that is requisite for the realization of that goal.

Whether you can afford it or not should never be a consideration. Whether you want to or not is the only consideration. You can afford anything; there is an infinite supply of money. All of the money in the world is available to you, when the decision is firmly made. If you need money, you will attract it.

How often have you caught yourself saying, "I would like to do or have this but I can't because ..." Whatever follows "because" is the circumstance. Circumstances may cause a detour in your life but you should never permit them to stop you from making important decisions.

Napoleon said, "Circumstances, I make them."

The next time you hear someone say they would like to vacation in Paris, or purchase a particular automobile but they can't because they have no money, explain they don't need the money until they make the decision to go to Paris or purchase the car. When the decision is made, they will figure out a way to get the amount needed. They always do.

Many misguided individuals try something once or twice and if they do not hit the bulls-eye, they feel they are a failure. Failing does not make anyone a failure, but quitting most certainly does and quitting is a decision. By following that form of reasoning, you would have to say when you make a decision to quit, you make a decision to fail.

Take the first step in predicting your own prosperous future. Build a mental picture of exactly how you would like to live. Make a firm decision to hold on to that vision and positive ways to improve everything will begin to flow into your mind.

Your life is important and, at its best, life is short. You have the potential to do anything you choose, and to do it well. But, you must make decisions and when the time for a decision arrives, you must make your decision where you are with what you've got.

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Monday, July 19, 2010

A Legacy of Leadership!


Posted by Peter Comrie

There lies in the heart of every man a quiet hunger. A longing for an earth shaking significance. It can be heard in the quiet, most unedited times like when our head hits the pillow at night. As the pressures of the day fade away the voice catches our attention. “I was meant for more than this, there has got to be something more.”

This calling catches us by surprise at the strangest times. We have felt it as a fire-in-the-belly as we watch movies like Braveheart and Gladiator. We remember the zealous times of our youth when our ideals and passion seemed to rule us. The world, however has ended up cold and somewhere along the road something was lost.

Many men and women alike have learned to accept a life of quiet resignation, committed to maintaining the status-quo. But still, in the times we least expect it, we hear that distant call again. A call for meaning, purpose, passion, significance. It continues to haunt us, to stalk us, and as we try to silence it with reason and maturity we find that indeed, it is a fire within our bones and it will not yield.

Our suspicions are correct. There is a larger story and we have a role to play in it. It has been said that what a man does during his life shall echo throughout eternity. Regardless of whether we choose to or not, we will leave a legacy. We will leave either blessings or curses to those that follow.

Marianne Williamson wrote,

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”


Most men spend years running from their purpose. Many spend years in waiting for their purpose to be revealed. But it is on the battleground of life that you find your role in the larger story. The script will not be delivered before the next scene, but it will come to you in your courage.

If you are ready to find your purpose, find the voice. Go back to the places that you have heard it most clear. For some it comes in the early morning, before the cares of the day have drowned them out. For others it comes through music, or movies, or books. For others it is found on a walk through the woods or on the side of a mountain. Find the voice again and listen. Allow it to stir you up again. Then begin to move in the direction it calls.

Your legacy is written on your heart, it’s up to you to lead and write it on the hearts of others.

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Friday, July 16, 2010

The Miracle is YOU!


Well my friends, as we wrap up this week I've been caused to reflect on the many wonderful individuals it is my honor to have connected with these past days. Some I've known for only a short while, some a bit longer, some for years, and some that I have re-connected with after a very long time. What a joy they all are.

I got me thinking about the miracles that must happening in the Universe for us to meet, to agree to get along, and for us to do the magical things we engage in each and every day. As a consequence of my meandering thoughts it came to me that one of the most important things I can to is to commit to never taking any one of you for granted. I recognize that you are truly a miracle in my life, and I celebrate you.

In honor of you, I present a short video by the wonderful Kute Blackson that clearly will remind you that you are indeed something to celebrate. The Miracle is YOU!





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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Disciplined for Life!

by Bob Urichuck

If it is to be, it is up to me! ~ unknown


Discipline is defined as a commitment to the most important person in the world. It means doing what you have to do, even when you don't want to do it. - Bob Urichuck


Any behavior that gets recognized and/or rewarded gets repeated. To be disciplined for life requires that you recognize and reward yourself accordingly.

So let's start with the first question: who is the most important person in the world? While you are at it, who is your greatest enemy?

It is fair to say that you came into this world as a miracle? Then what happened?

You got exposed to the outside world - family, religion, education, friends, politics, etc., and you internalized these messages. You have created who you are by what you allowed in. Is it fair to say you have created your own fears, barriers, limitations, and beliefs primarily because you have lived your life from the outside-in? Is it fair to say you are who you are because of you?

Yes, you are the most important person in the world, and at the same time your own worst enemy.

Maybe it is time to take a good look at your beliefs about you. As an adult, you should be able to distinguish between fact and fiction - what is real about you and what is not. Maybe it is time to turn things around, to believe in yourself, to take control of your life and start living your life from the inside - out.

Your beliefs will determine your attitude. Your attitude determines how you feel, and how you feel determines the actions you take, which in the end provide you with results. Are you getting the results you are looking for? If not, take control of your life and start living your life from the inside-out, instead of the outside-in.

Combining attitude and discipline, both of which are 100% under your control, will increase your performance by 200%. By the way, each word when translated to numeric value adds up to 100. Try it and see for yourself.

Of all commitments one makes in life, the one you make to yourself is by far the most important. So, make some commitments and get Disciplined for Life, as you are the author of your future.

What is the most productive time of your day - morning, day or night? What would happen if you took one hour of that most productive time and dedicated it to the most important person in the world? As a morning person, that is what I do first. After that hour, I reward myself with my first cup of coffee. Ummm, is it ever good.

Just applying this one discipline in your life will make the difference. But there is so much more I want to share with you, and it is all in my new book: Disciplined for Life You are the Author of Your Future





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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

The House of 1000 Mirrors


Posted by Phil Evans

Long ago in a small, far away village, there was a place known as the House of 1000 Mirrors. A small, happy little dog learned of this place and decided to visit. When he arrived, he bounced happily up the stairs to the doorway of the house. He looked through the doorway with his ears lifted high and his tail wagging as fast as it could. To his great surprise, he found himself staring at 1000 other happy little dogs with their tails wagging just as fast as his. He smiled a great smile, and was answered with 1000 great smiles just as warm and friendly. As he left the house, he thought to himself, "This is a wonderful place. I will come back and visit it often."

In this same village, another little dog, who was not quite as happy as the first one, decided to visit the house. He slowly climbed the stairs and hung his head low as he looked into the door. When he saw the 1000 unfriendly looking dogs staring back at him, he growled at them and was horrified to see 1000 little dogs growling back at him. As he left, he thought to himself, "That is a horrible place, and I will never go back there again."

All the faces in the world are mirrors.

What kind of reflections do you see in the faces of the people you meet?

Footnote: As a person who lived a life surrounded by far too many ugly mirrors; and didn't understand what I refer to these days as The Mirror Principle; I hope that this brilliant little folk tale may help to create some "aha" moments for some people out there.

Personal Confession: When I was first told about it, about 10 years ago, it was the worst piece of information that I had ever been given! I did NOT want to know about it! No way! It was far too challenging for me; simply because what I saw in others quite often horrified me!

I didn't like what I saw: and being told that "what I see out there is simply a reflection of how I'm feeling inside", was one of my greatest personal challenges, and can sometimes be a necessary wake-up call for me if any feelings of judgment start creeping around.

Good point to remember: It is often these button-pushing episodes in our lives which are our greatest lessons, if we can actually step back from them and ask ourselves, "What is the lesson in this for me"?

Or; "What are the mirrors of life really telling me here"?

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Monday, July 12, 2010

Meditation and the Tyranny of Thoughts!


Posted by Robert Darby

The popularity of meditation rises and falls according to the levels of fear, insecurity and uncertainty experienced by a given population. But meditation is not like many other disciplines that are less difficult to master, and what makes it so difficult is found in the very nature of meditation itself. So many people are unable to overcome the challenges of this uniquely powerful tool and therefore are also unable to take advantage of its powerful benefits, that I thought a little insight into the basics of all meditation techniques might help.

Many different meditation techniques have been developed over time, and many of those target different goals, but the basic strategy or method for reaching those goals is fundamentally the same in that they require the development of a certain level of concentration. This is necessary because all meditation techniques work with the concepts of attention and focus, and these, by their very nature demand the organization and deployment of conscious energy in the form of awareness.

The Subtle Shift
This awareness is a very different kind of awareness, or perhaps more precisely, a different level of awareness. It is the illusive nature of this awareness that has resulted in so many people giving up on meditation before they begin to realize any benefits. They are simply not prepared for the alien reality that is native to meditation. And this is the irony of the world according to meditation. That alien reality that we are not prepared for, is actually the real world, reality as it truly is. The question is; if that is the real world, what world are we living in? Which is the question and the need that we turn to meditation to solve in the first place; the need to see the world as it truly is, rather than our conceptualized versions of reality.

This brings us to what I call the subtle shift. And this is where most people succeed or fail at meditation. The subtle shift is the shift of our attention from one reality to another, one level of awareness to another, and one state of consciousness to another. Most meditation techniques require that we sit motionless and try to focus our attention on some object or condition. Let's take the vipassana technique, which focuses on the breath. There I sit focused on the experience of breathing, I feel the air passing across the entrance of my nose as it comes in and goes out. But then something happens, I'm thinking about focusing on my breath, I'm seeing the idea of breath, and suddenly I realize that I am no longer experiencing my breath directly but only paying attention to my thoughts about breath. One awareness is the actual experience of what is going on right here and right now, the other is the conceptual experience of a collection of word in my mind that form an idea of what is going on. The act of realizing that my awareness has shifted from direct experience to an intellectual construct is called mindfulness and is the all-important recognition of the subtle shift.

What, Where and When Am I?
The reason I call it the subtle shift is, well, it's so subtle that a beginning meditator doesn't notice that their attention has shifted away from the here and now. This changes in time, as we begin to develop our mindfulness, that unattached observer that does not respond to the random thoughts of the mind but only notices them arise and fall from awareness. Not all thoughts are meaningless; some of the thoughts that bubble up from our unconscious mind are about issues that we needed to become aware of in order to deal with them once and for all. But still, we don't get involved emotionally or intellectually, we don't let the tyranny of our random thoughts take us to the past or future or some abstract imaginary reality.

Eventually, with practice, we develop the mental discipline and mindfulness necessary to allow us to be aware of the activity of our mind and what our thoughts are about, where our thoughts are about, when our thoughts are about, as they are about. When this occurs, we begin to see what is real and what is not, we begin to see reality as it truly is, when it truly is, where it truly is. More than any other discipline, meditation requires the investment of patience, commitment and perseverance, but the return on these investments can be huge in both the spiritual and material worlds.

Robert Darby is a self change and personal development specialist who writes for many organizations including The Agenda Of Life Foundation. He focuses on developing personal power since that is usually the cause of all Human problems. Robert takes a practical approach that looks at the various tools and techniques out there that are designed to help us achieve our mental, spiritual and emotional goals.

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Saturday, July 10, 2010

Disposability Consciousness!


Why does our society believe it is alright to throw away so much? In fact, what does it even mean to 'throw' something away? Julia Butterfly Hill reflects here on these questions to help each of us understand why it is important for us to change our approach to consumption as individuals and as a society. Julia is a Full Spectrum Leader.

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Friday, July 9, 2010

Resistance to Inner Stillness!


by Alan F. Zundel

Many people are aware of meditation, but few actually practice it. Yet those of us who do meditate are not that different from those who do not—we all experience resistance.

Some people have heard of meditation but are not interested in it. Their goals and priorities are different; they are not as interested in looking inward as they are in outward achievement. They may think of meditation as something weird that normal people do not engage in, or that it is a waste of time when they could be doing something useful.

Other people express an interest in meditation but never seem to get around to practicing it. They say they cannot find time for it, but likely they could give up time from other activities such as watching television if they really wanted to. Something other than lack of time seems to be the real reason, perhaps a belief that meditation is going to take effort or be boring.

In both sets of people there is a resistance to meditation; there is a resistance called ‘I don’t want to be weird’ and there is a resistance called ‘I don’t have time for it.’ But resistance is also present in people who do meditate.

When you meditate you find your mind resisting becoming quiet and still; it wants to go running off in different directions, and it take a little time and effort—sometimes a lot of time and effort—to get the mind to settle down. There is resistance to silence, resistance to stillness—resistance to whatever it is that meditation is meant to bring into your life, even when you express a desire for those things. So what is this resistance all about? What is it in us that wants to avoid spending time in stillness?

Some of it is inertia. We are so used to operating on a more superficial level of the mind, of thought, of emotion, that it is hard to break out of that. It takes effort, and we resist making effort. We sense that being left alone with one’s mind, as when someone is shut in solitary confinement, is not fun. There is something about the way our mind functions that is tiresome and annoying and irritating and even painful; that is why we want to be entertained, because we don’t want to experience the pain of listening to our own mind run on and on. If it takes effort to deal with that, well, it is a lot easier to distract ourselves from it.

When the mind finally begins to settle and we experience a degree of inner stillness, then we sense that between this initial experience and a much deeper sense of silence and stillness there is something else we must pass through in order to get there: the pain of unresolved emotions. When you begin to open yourself up, emotions that in your past were too intense and painful to fully accept have to be relived to fully integrate them into your consciousness and go beyond them. Feelings come up from your childhood—humiliations, fears, traumas—and your mind will start kicking at the bit so you do not have to go through that, creating all kinds of fantasies and interesting distractions.

Beyond that, we vaguely sense that the inner stillness brings change, and we are afraid of change that the mind cannot control. Even when we say we want change in our life, what we really want is to be able to control the change and direct it toward an outcome we can predict. Opening yourself up to the stillness represents letting go to something deeper that may change you in ways you cannot control. There is resistance to this something ‘other’ in ourselves.

We may tell ourselves and truly believe that this ‘other’ is the divine, yet still there can be resistance; it is hard to give up control even to God—maybe especially to God! But then there is the fear that maybe the something inside is not transcendent love and goodness; maybe it is dark unconscious psychological forces or even demonic spirits. There can be a fear that you will totally lose control and ‘go crazy’ by giving in to the stillness. We may think we know who we are, but there is the feeling that some hidden and powerful part of ourselves can take over and maybe even obliterate the familiar self.

So resistance has many levels, and many manifestations and rationalizations, but at the bottom it is a sense of fear—fear of letting go, fear of facing emotional pain, and fear of change, all of which are related. Letting go allows the pain to arise, yet precipitates the process that changes you into the person whom you have yearned to become. And that is what we fear most of all—being fully ourselves, without all of the masks and defenses. Naming the resistance for what it is allows you to see the choice that is open before you.

Alan F. Zundel is a counselor, author, and teacher currently living in Eugene, Oregon. His talks are available to download for free at HeartAwake Center at www.heartawake.org.



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Thursday, July 8, 2010

Taking Personal Responsibility!

The Art of Giving Up All Hope For a Better Yesterday!

By Peter Comrie

“Young man, may I sit here”. Looking up from my book to see where the request was being directed, I saw that the only empty seat available was at my table. There stood a delightful looking lady holding a latte cup about the size of a kitchen sink with an almost pleading look in her eyes. “May I sit here” she repeated.

Now you know right away she had me, first with the “young man” comment (I’m 59), and then with the softest gentle blue eyes, resting behind a pair of the most elegant eyeglasses I have ever seen. Springing to my feet, the chair opposite was quickly opened from the table like a welcoming clam shell.

With her monster cup secure on the table, she thanked me, and I settled back into my reading. After a few minutes I observed she retrieved a manila folder from her bag and began flipping through the papers it contained. Glancing up I noticed she had developed a pronounced number 11 right above her nose, and I heard the distinctive sound of sighs of exasperation. Then came the sniffle.

Oblivious to my presence, she wiped her tear, gently blew her nose, and settled in to her seat with the weight of resignation. As she looked up in my direction I asked her quietly if she was OK, and after eyeing me for a few seconds, answered in the affirmative.

I introduced myself, and she followed with an emerging smile, and told me her name. She proceeded to tell me that her “moment” was in response to the legal documents in her folder. Continuing on, she told me that her late husband took care of all the legal issues during their life together, and now she had to learn how to manage them on her own.

This obviously intelligent and articulate lady went on to share with me that her mate of almost 50 years “protected” her from the vagaries of business and legal matters. Her countenance began to change as I could see she was becoming quite irritated, and then she dropped the bombshell. “I’m so mad at him right now that if he were here I’d likely kick his butt”. Now she really had my attention!

She continued, “He thought he was shielding me from the complexities of our life and business and now I discover that they are so darned simple I could have been doing a better job of them than he did”. This lovely person shared with me that she had now discovered that her affairs had a set of conditions that were going to impact her in ways that were totally unnecessary, and a complete waste of money. She had uncovered that if she had influenced her hubby with the disciplines she used to run her household, her “nest egg” would be substantially greater.

Sensing a touch of relief in her as she let her story out, I ventured to ask her why she had allowed this to happen. As she peered over the top of her glasses giving me “the look” she asked what I meant by her “allowing this to happen”. I shared with her that indeed she had contributed greatly to the situation in not taking her own responsibility to involve herself in all of their joint life. I also cautiously suggested that if they didn’t entirely communicate in the business and legal arenas that there may have been communication issues in other areas of their life.

“Oh Peter, we had a wonderful life, beautiful children, lot’s a travel, parties, lovely homes, and now today I feel like such a phony. I’m realizing that there were so very many things that we didn’t do, and the most important one being that we didn’t really communicate”. I asked her if I could make a suggestion, and she nodded in the affirmative.

“Forgive yourselves and move on”. She looked a little confused, I continued, “No matter how hard you plead, beg, pray, or cajole your higher power, you can’t change one single thing that happened yesterday”. She asked me “How can I forgive him when he is no longer here?”

As we settled more comfortably into the conversation I shared with her that forgiving herself and her husband is simply her taking personal responsibility for the parts they each played in the creating of their life. Also that forgiving isn’t for the “forgivee”, but for the “forgiver”. It’s the way to release ourselves from the self-imposed binds of the past, and to move forward with a new sense of lightness. I shared that “Forgiveness allows us to truly give up all hope for a better yesterday”.

She smiled in way that lit up the whole coffee shop as she said, “Well young man (she had my number), I didn’t expect this when I came in today. There is clearly some work I have to do, and you’re right, I do feel lighter just at the thought of it all”.

As I rose to leave, bidding her well on her journey, she eyed my wedding ring and asked, “How are your communications with your wife?” I stopped, looked her right in the eyes, grinned and said “Enthusiastic”.

Peter Comrie, is a co-founder of Full Spectrum Leadership, a Kelowna personal development training group that is driving a mission to develop 100 leaders per year for the next ten years. For more information visit: www.fullspectrumleadership.ca


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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Are You a Success Liar?


By Martin Avis

Would you like to know why it is that I'm not as rich and successful as Donald Trump?

Or why it is that you are sitting there with less success and a lot less money in the bank than Warren Buffet?

One word will answer that conundrum: liar.

I'm a liar.

You're a liar. Pretty much everyone you know is a liar.

I'm not trying to pick a fight here - just pointing out that one of the most basic human traits - and the biggest obstacle to our own success - is our ability to pull the wool over our own eyes.

We tell ourselves all kinds of things to justify our actions (and more often inactions), but when we really get down to it, most of those things we tell ourselves are lies.

We make up excuses for our anticipated lack of success, and then set up a mental feedback loop where those excuses keep getting repeated in our minds over and over again.

The more like Donald Trump and Warren Buffet we become, the fewer excuses we make. Less excuses = more success.

Yet here we are, telling ourselves lies that if we bothered to take a moment to analyze would quickly be revealed as falsehoods. We tell ourselves the same old fictions over and over again until the sheer act of repetition makes them seem more and more real in our minds.

And before we know what has happened, our quick, un-thought through excuses become ingrained. They assume their own reality and success is once again pushed out of reach.

In this way we lie to ourselves all the time.

99% of all the lies we tell ourselves that affect our potential for success include one of the most common 4- letter words in the English language (okay, be pedantic, four letters and an apostrophe): can't.

Our subconscious mind doesn't like unfinished sentences, so when we say 'I can't' it has to tack on 'because' at the end.

So if you think, 'I can't be successful', your subconscious mind will add 'because I'm too lazy' or 'because I don't have the skills' or some other negative - and usually spurious - explanation. And then it is the false explanation that is stored, ready to poison your every effort.

'I can't write a book.' Why not? Because 'I'm not good with words', 'because nobody would read it' because I'll never find a publisher'. All silly statements that could easily be proved wrong after the book is written, but which serve to prevent you from taking action in case things go wrong, and of course, from ever reaching the success you really want.

When the 'because' is repeated internally often enough to be stored in the part of your brain that determines your own self-image, the 'I can't' is justified.

You just HAVE to make yourself a liar so that your knee-jerk 'I can't' reaction can become true.

It may be a paradox, but it is one that is holding you, me and everyone else back from achieving our success in all kinds of ways.

But you CAN break the cycle. You CAN start to change your subconscious self-image. You CAN stop your unconscious mind from making you a liar. You CAN be a success.

The only way that I know of to break the cycle is to remove the need for the brain to create its 'because' lie in the first place. Remove the 'not' part of the equation.

'I can' doesn't need a justification - it is a positive statement of fact.

'I can' doesn't make you a liar - it makes you a doer.

You have years of lies to address, so erasing them will take time, but it CAN be done.

Every opportunity you get, repeat to yourself 'I CAN do ... [whatever it is you want to do.]'

Think about all the successful people that you've heard about. Most of the time they didn't start out with any more natural ability than you. They don't have any particular success secret to making it big. They simply go into every new venture with the attitude that 'I CAN succeed.'

The strange thing is that more often than not, when you start out something new brimful of confidence that you CAN succeed at it, events seem to work out that you will be successful.

Success comes from being honest with yourself and finally admitting that you can do it.

Martin Avis publishes the acclaimed 3x-weekly email newsletter Kickstart Today - an eclectic mix of personal development, Internet marketing and unrestrained opinion. Subscription is free from http://www.kickstartdaily.com

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Monday, July 5, 2010

The Triggering Event

Posted by Brian Kim

If you've ever read a story of someone who has made a significant positive change in their life or personally know somebody who has, you’ll probably find that behind that change was a triggering event, either a positive or negative one.

Perhaps the guy you knew had his heart broken by someone who he deeply loved. Perhaps that person read a life changing book. Perhaps that person had a close friend die of cancer. In any case, that triggering event was the starting point of significant change in that person’s life, one that shocked him out of apathy and I think we can all relate in one way or another to this kind of experience.

Take for example, a man who has been dating a woman and has fallen head over heels in love with her. He thinks about her all the time, all his chips are on the table and he is fully committed but one day, the woman he’s so deeply mad in love with tells him she does not feel the same way about him. His world buckles and comes crashing down. Food has no taste. His social life suffers. He closes the curtains in his house and drinks away his sorrow. He listens to their song over and over again and cries his heart out. We all know somebody in our social circle who has experienced this. It is one of the hardest things to deal with. Yet after months of this behavior, something happens within this man. He realizes that the problem was not anything outside of him, but himself the whole time so he resolves to become a better man than he was before. He takes responsibility for himself, develops discipline, self control, gets in shape, pursues his goals, in effect, gets his act together and becomes the man he knows he can fully become. Out of this pain of rejection comes forth the resolve to be a better man and the gift of the realization that he must work on himself first to become the best man he can be.

Take for another example, a man whose friend dies of cancer. His world is shaken. Things he regarded as important now seem so trivial. He realizes how short life is and he wonders if he will regret doing what he’s doing right now when he looks back on his life. That triggering event of a friend’s death can give him the courage to take a new path that he never would have considered doing before. This triggering event, what it basically does is throw a boulder into the pond that we all seem to take comfort in and sends huge rippling effects that forces us to ask ourselves the hard questions that we normally would like to avoid in our lives. It changes our perspective on things and we go on a journey of self introspection. We also get a sense of urgency and in effect, this triggering event gives us the necessary energy to get us to the next level much like it takes energy for an electron to go the next orbit level (high school flashback I know). We start doing things we never would of before because of this triggering event.

The question naturally arises. Do we need a triggering event in our lives, positive or negative to change our lives? Here’s my answer. To make significant change, yes. To change, no. Anybody can change. Buy some new clothes. Pick up a hobby. Exercise. But when it comes to significant change, and by that I mean changing yourself at the core level, who you are, what you want to do, who you wish to be, when you know your outlook on life has changed forever from that moment on, that kind of change, then yes, you do need a triggering event. Negative triggering events have a way of stripping us of everything we thought we knew about ourselves and life. Needless to say, more often than not, these negative triggering events come off the heels of something really bad – depression, attempted suicide, loss of a loved one, rejection, etc. It wipes the slate clean and gives us a fresh start and it’s up to us to decide what to build from it.

Positive triggering events have a way of expanding the narrow view we often have of life. We watch, read and hear of inspirational stories and see people maximize their capability and that in turns gives us the energy to take that leap of faith and go for whatever it is that we wish to do. In effect, we realize that we have all this room for potential to do the things we thought we couldn’t do because of these positive triggering events. Is one triggering event greater than the other? It’s hard to say. It really is. On the one hand, the negative triggering event is VERY dangerous because it’s in the eye of the beholder which path to take. The path of rebuilding or the path of continued self destruction. Few people choose to rebuild. Many people choose to self destruct. But this negative triggering event has the greatest potential for significant change because you basically start from scratch.

For me, the cause of my change was rooted in negative triggering events and the ironic thing is that I am grateful of it. If I had to do it all over again, I would live through the negative triggering events because they have made me the man I am today. Why did I write this article? I basically wrote this article to show people who might be experiencing a negative triggering event right now that even though they don’t realize it, it’s probably one of the best things that could’ve ever happened in your life.

I’m here to tell you that there IS light at the end of the tunnel and that you will one day be truly thankful for it. You really will. It will prove to be the fuel that will launch you to the life you’ve always dreamed of. You’ll often find that the best gifts life gives are the ones we don’t even realize we’ve received until we look back.

The Full Spectrum Leadership team actively supports the many amazing contributors who add value to the personal development industry. Peter Shepherd of Trans4Mind for many years has consistently endeavored to bring us all the very best thinking available today. We support Cultivate Life Magazine, and for the lowly cost of $20 per year we are sure you will appreciate having Peter, Guy, Brian and the team in your corner.

Click image below and check it out for yourself.

Cultivate Life! Magazine



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Friday, July 2, 2010

Great Quotes from Great Leaders


As we prepare to help our American friends celebrate Independence Day on July 4th we often reflect on the sacrifices made by the leaders that have preceded us. Take a few minutes today to enjoy the movie, “Great Quotes from Great Leaders,” which is filled with timeless wisdom from a variety of leaders who have inspired, encouraged and led us to do the right thing.

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Thursday, July 1, 2010

You Make a Difference!



by Burge Smith-Lyons

Who you are makes a difference!

"A teacher in New York decided to honor each of her seniors in High School by telling them the difference each of them had made. She called each student to the front of the class, one at a time.

First, she told each of them how they had made a difference to her, and the class. Then she presented each of them with a blue ribbon, imprinted with gold letters, which read, "Who I Am Makes a Difference." Afterwards, the teacher decided to do a class project, to see what kind of impact recognition would have on a Community. She gave each of the students three more blue ribbons, and instructed them to go out and spread this acknowledgment ceremony.

Then they were to follow up on the results, see who honored whom, and report to the class in about a week. One of the boys in the class went to a junior executive in a nearby Company, and honored him for helping him with his career planning. He gave him a blue ribbon, and put it on his shirt. Then he gave him two extra ribbons and said, "We're doing a class project on recognition, and we'd like for you to go out, find somebody to honor, give them a blue ribbon, then give them the extra blue ribbon so they can acknowledge a third person, to keep this acknowledgment ceremony going. Then please report back to me and tell me what happened."

Later that day, the junior executive went in to see his boss, who had been noted, by the way, as being kind of a grouchy fellow. He sat his boss down, and he told him that he deeply admired him for being a creative genius. The boss seemed very surprised. The junior executive asked him if he would accept the gift of the blue ribbon, and would he give him permission to put it on him. His surprised boss said, "Well, sure." The junior executive took the blue ribbon and placed it right on his boss's jacket, above his heart. As he gave him the last extra ribbon, he said, "Would you take this extra ribbon, and pass it on by honoring somebody else. The young boy who first gave me the ribbons is doing a project in school, and we want to keep this recognition ceremony going and find out how it affects people."

That night, the boss came home to his 14-year-old son, and sat him down. He said, "The most incredible thing happened to me today. I was in my office, and one of the junior executives came in and told me he admired me, and gave me a blue ribbon for being a creative genius. Imagine! He thinks I am a creative genius! Then he put a blue ribbon that says, "Who I Am Makes a Difference", on my jacket above my heart. He gave me an extra ribbon and asked me to find somebody else to honor. As I was driving home tonight, I started thinking about whom I would honor with this ribbon, and I thought about you. I want to honor you. My days are hectic and when I come home, I do not pay a lot of attention to you. Sometimes I scream at you for not getting good enough grades in school, and for your bedroom being a mess. Somehow, tonight, I just wanted to sit here and, well, just let you know that you do make a difference to me. Besides your mother, you are the most important person in my life. You're a great kid, and I love you!"

The startled boy started to sob and sob, and he could not stop crying His whole body shook. He looked up at his father and said through his tears, "Dad, earlier tonight I sat in my room and wrote a letter to you and Mom, explaining why I had took my life, and I asked you to forgive me. I was going to commit suicide tonight after you were asleep. I just did not think that you cared at all. The letter is upstairs. I don't think I need it after all." His father walked upstairs and found a heartfelt letter full of anguish and pain.

The boss went back to work a changed man. He was no longer a grouch, but made sure to let all of his employees know that they made a difference. The junior executive helped several other young people with career planning, and never forgot to let them know that they made a difference in his life...one being the boss' son. In addition, the young boy and his classmates learned a valuable lesson, "Who you are DOES make a difference".

I just wanted to remind all of us that “we do make a difference” and “we matter”.

Just as Buckminster Fuller explained in the theory of “precession”, every body in motion effects other bodies in motion. If we are moving toward a goal, we are creating an effect. The effect we create depends on the intention we have while moving toward a goal. You have heard it is the “journey not the destination” before. Once you achieve a goal, you may ask yourself , “Now what”? Remember, the value you add along the way is really what matters, not the goal. Keep moving forward and adding value and the effects you have on the world will matter and add value.

Let’s all remember to "demonstrate, demonstrate, demonstrate" and "never give up, never give in".

You are important!!

Burge Smith-Lyons is president and CEO of Essence of Being Inc. For more than 29 years she has been involved with the healing, learning and educational environment. Burge has facilitated workshops for personal growth and corporate seminars since 1980. She has led private and public venues in self-development, relationships and abundance for adults and children. She specializes in helping people identify their "Bubble Talk" — subconscious negative self-talk that blocks them from achieving what they want in life.

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