By Philip Humbert
I've noticed an interesting paradox: The most effective, most successful people I've worked with seem to have two things in common. They seem comfortable, challenged, even exhilarated by chaos, and yet they maintain balance and tranquility in their lives. It's a amazing set of skills!
The most effective people seem to thrive in a world of chaos and constant change. They understand life is not actually "chaotic," that the laws of cause-and-effect still apply, but they live as if turmoil and confusion are normal! They know that results are based on intelligent action and focused effort, while they develop superb skills to "play and win" in a chaotic, often contradictory world.
They are unusually comfortable with ambiguity. They know they will never have enough information. They know the rules are often out of date before they are even published, and yet they thrive.
In the midst of chaos, they go quietly about their business. When others are losing control, they remain calm. When others panic, they have a cup of tea and contemplate their next strategic move. They often move quickly, but always with a sense of confidence, power and grace. How can this be?
In this regard, I'm intrigued by the TV show, "Desperate Housewives." Millions of people identify with the chaos and confusion of the overworked mother with hyper-active kids or the dizzy divorcee.
Obviously the show is designed for drama and ratings, but what deeply troubles me is the level of wealth, beauty and "success" the characters seem to enjoy. People with confused, chaotic lives rarely live that well! The WINNERS in life do not live with over-whelm and dysfunction. They have to get things done!
Several things are necessary to thrive in the midst of chaos:
1. Exceptional boundaries. This is where the "desperate" housewives go astray because they seem to have no boundaries at all. Winners close their doors and ignore disruptions. They turn off the phone and claim their space. They know where they are going and tolerate few distractions.
2. Exceptional vision. Winners know their priorities and their desired outcomes. They know what they want and they can see, taste, smell and almost touch their results in advance. They have goals and tasks rather than mere hopes or wishes.
3. Exceptional self-direction. Winners are in charge of their lives and chaos around them is just that -- other people's chaos swirling around them, while they maintain an inner calm. They are not lost or confused about their values, their priorities, their direction or their most important daily tasks.
4. Exceptional optimism. They see chaos as opportunity. Chaos "stirs the pot" and opens doors. Rather than annoying or frustrating them, they love it! On a wild and windy day, a rainbow may appear at any moment and they are eager to welcome it.
5. Exceptional Reserves. They take care of themselves. They eat well, rest often, save and invest wisely and when opportunity knocks, they are waiting to answer the door. They operate from strength and stability, while a chaotic world wreaks havoc on the competition.
6. Exceptional response-ability. Rather than reacting from stress, anger, fear or anxiety, they see a magnificent, ever-changing world and respond quickly to once-in-a- lifetime opportunities. "Desperate" people react; winners respond.
John Lennon observed that "life is what happens while you were making other plans." Life will not wait until we are ready or until we catch our breath. Winners learn to thrive on chaos. They see and seize opportunities, and love the wild ride. They recognize the risks and enjoy the drama, while operating from a place of inner calm. In a world swirling with change and chaos, winners keep their balance, take care of themselves and focus on their goals.
Dr Humbert is a Success Strategist, author and popular speaker. Imagine what's possible! To inquire about having him speak to your group or organization, or to schedule an initial consultation, contact him or visit his site at Philip Humbert.com
Monday, May 31, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
by Peter Comrie
Developing a positive mindset is one of the most powerful life strategies there is. Using powerful positive thinking techniques, visualizations and positive affirmations, it is possible to achieve whatever you want. Professionals and business people can use these techniques to develop personal power or gain a competitive edge. At a personal level it will transform your life, your health and renew the joy and passion for life. Imagine waking up each morning, bursting with excitement, energy and joy for the new day! It really is that powerful...
Positive affirmations and positive thinking techniques can help develop a powerful and positive attitude to life; which is an essential element in life success and good health. With this power you can turn failure around into success and take success and drive it to a whole new level. Your positive attitude is the fuel for your success. The techniques outlined on this site are used either deliberately or instinctively by all the most successful people; and you can use them too.
Sound psychological techniques, your own personal power and your connection to the universe can create an incredible combination to manifest any change into your life. There are no limits. Just go for it... prove it for yourself...the young lady below sets an awesome example of the power of affirming techniques.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
by Gabriella Kortsch
Many of us fall into the fallacy of believing that we can control our environment and the persons who people it. Therefore, we steadfastly cling to the mistaken belief that if only we could make our spouse more emotionally available, or if only we could make our parents less intrusive, or if only we could make our boss more approachable, or if only we could make our teenage offspring more manageable, or if only we could make
our neighbors less noisy, life would be wonderful. And we spend our time working on devising ways of changing these people, driven by the conviction that this would be the solution to all or most of our problems. The truth of the matter is that the only one we actually can control is our self.
Other Side of the Coin
We rarely look at this other side of the coin…the fact that if we want to achieve any kind of change in our lives, it has to begin with our self. Frequently change that we bring about in our own person will motivate change in others, almost like a ripple effect that can be observed in a pond when you throw a pebble into the water, but this change in others, or in the environment should not be the stimulus to your own change. That should be sought for itself, in order that you can become more of what you really are, and are capable of being; in other words, in order that you grow into yourself. (see my article “Leaving Your Comfort Zone”),
The Silver Bullet
Evidently the eternal question is: how do you change or control yourself? What is the magic formula? Is there a silver bullet? And the simple answer is choice. Knowing that no matter what you feel, think, say, or do, you always have choices and alternatives, is one of the most enriching and liberating thoughts there is. When you are reacting to a given event, brought upon by your own thoughts, a nostalgic song on the radio, another person, a difficult financial situation, or even a cataclysmic global incident, always ask yourself whether there are alternatives to your current way of reacting. Then ask yourself whether any of those alternatives are feasible, and whether they would make a positive difference as compared to the initial mode of reacting you had intended. By consciously choosing to react differently, you are not only controlling yourself by self - awareness, but you are also changing yourself because your reaction is no longer unconscious, and thus you are offering yourself one of the greatest gifts of all - freedom from that blindness.
Friday, May 21, 2010
by Peter Comrie
Well my friends, we are wrapping up another incredible week here in the Okanagan Valley with visions of sugar plums dancing in our heads for our first Impact Evening coming up next Wednesday. As I got to thinking how to express my feelings on the work we do it became very clear to me that all we can ever do is simply "step up" and engage with the one power that is behind all of us.
The outstanding singer/songwriter Daniel Nahmod with his song, "One Power," takes a non-denominational view at the higher forces at work in our world. His inspirational lyrics, coupled with touching images of nature and humanity, will surely inspire you to find more opportunities to be loving in all of your future days.
Daniel's song addresses the fact that, despite differences in beliefs, all of humanity is joined in a common goal of discovering the love that exists within us all. You're going to enjoy what he has to share.
On this holiday weekend take some time to reflect on the depth of love that lives within you.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Before we can really lock into meaningful personal development and create the life we truly desire, there are a number of basic concepts that must be accepted. In personal development, as in any other field, there are fundamental truths that exist. If we want to experience optimal results, we need to understand and fully embrace those truths.
While the existence of these personal development truths may be generally accepted on an intellectual level, more than acknowledgment is required. This seems to be one of the major differences between people who make things happen in life, and those who can’t figure out why things are the way they are.
“I know” doesn’t get it done!
If you have ever raised a teenager, you are probably familiar with the phrase “I know.” That’s what you hear when they neglected to do something. Obviously, knowing wasn’t enough. When it comes to our own personal development, could we be doing the same thing?
Many people who know the following 7 personal development truths are not getting the results they would like for this very reason. To get past that tendency, I invite you to use this list for some honest self-evaluation. As you look at each item, you may think to yourself: “I already know that.” In that case, stop and ask yourself: “Am I doing something with that knowledge?” In other words, are you really following through?
7 basics personal development truths
1) Always take responsibility for your life. We must recognize that our life is our personal responsibility. This is the foundation of all personal development. We can either accept conditions as they are, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Whatever we choose to do, we must acknowledge that we are the only person responsible for our decisions and actions. Taking personal responsibility is the catalyst of all positive personal power. Do you honestly believe that?
2) Make a commitment to taking massive action. Planning and deciding are very important steps, but without action they have almost no value. Likewise, halfhearted or limited action is not going to get things done. If you want to change your life experience, be willing to keep taking action in the direction of your goals. Life is full of hills and valleys. It can be pretty challenging to keep taking action when things get rough. Quitting will not get you where you want to go. Only action can do that. Are you taking action to create the life you want?
3) Get emotionally involved in your life. Be passionate about what you are doing and know why you are doing it. Wrap yourself around your dreams and desires. Get excited about transforming your dreams into reality. Take time to experience the energy that comes from a passionate pursuit of your desires. This is your life we are talking about, it’s not a movie. To experience life to the full you must stay engaged. Are you truly involved in your life?
4) Set and pursue worthwhile goals that you truly believe in. Always have something positive ahead of you. Something you can look forward to, work toward, and hope for. Turn your dreams into goals and your goals into projects. Life is a journey and the goals you set determine the direction of that journey. Make your journey a worthwhile one by pursuing the goals, and doing the things, that you really believe in. Does your life include these meaningful pursuits?
5) Believe in yourself and have confidence in your success. Your feelings, attitudes and behavior all grow from your beliefs. If you believe that you can, you probably can. Belief builds confidence and confidence leads to action. Don’t impose limits on your own abilities by holding limiting beliefs and making negative predictions. Deep down, you know you can do whatever you set your mind on, so hold onto that belief. Do your actions show that you truly believe in yourself?
6) Maintain a clear mental picture of your intended results. Focus is the power plant of achievement. Take time to visualize your desired outcome daily, see it as a real and focus on what you see. Your brain will accept your vision as reality if you continue to maintain your focus. Once that happens, your life will literally rearrange itself around that perceived reality. Your focus defines the course of your life. Be sure you are focusing in the direction you want your life to go. Are you?
7) Give yourself unconditional approval for all of the above. The need for approval is at the very core of everything we do. Approval from outside sources is encouraging, but it is absolutely vital that you approve of yourself. Do not make this contingent on your accomplishments. You need to approve of yourself as a person aside from your accomplishments. Allow yourself to give unconditional approval to “you” as a worthwhile and valuable person. Approval is at the heart of a healthy self-esteem. Have you given yourself the approval you deserve?
Note: Keep in mind that we are all a work in progress. That means that there will always be room for improvement. That is why they call it personal development, because it’s a process of continual improvement. The important thing is to do the best we can so that we keep our life moving in the right direction.
Is there more?
Of course there is, but these 7 fundamental personal development truths will serve you well on your journey through life. They are the foundation of a meaningful and productive life experience. Practice these and I guarantee that you will always be way ahead of the curve.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
by Peter Comrie
There are some days when it is very clear indeed that there no words need to be said. With all of the worldwide stuff going on, the gulf oil deal devastating the ocean, the meltdown of the European monetary union, the ongoing ubiquitous argument about who's God is right. Geez, and we're supposed to be the smart species.
Today you need a break. A short delightful reminder that nature provides you lessons, that if you pay attention too, will show you that there is a power larger than anything you can imagine making sure that you are loved, and all is well.
Monday, May 17, 2010
by Sky Sheridan
You should have, could have, and would have. But you didn’t. So why put yourself on the path of guilt and regret? How will that help you? Our biggest mistake is making them one. If we fail, let it be forward. If we miss a train, or are late for a flight, if we spent too much money, lost a job, or just broke up with our partner, why do immediately assume the worst? By doing so, we only empower our lack and limitation. And yet, the beautiful natural state of our well being is always waiting for us to return and start trusting.
When we doubt an experience, and/or ourselves we are being given an opportunity to trust. There are endless examples in our world that life always finds a way to make the impossible, possible. Think about it, our planet earth is orbiting around a star, one of billions of stars in this Milky Way galaxy, which is one of billions of galaxies in the known universe. Living on this blue dot in the void of space is proof enough that we can always make anything possible.
Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” Possibility is only a perception. Impossible things become possible everyday. This is the root desire of consciousness, to expand into the infinite unknown, bringing light into the darkness. By knowing possibility you will illuminate your own infinite potential and release your lack and limitation.
Oh sure, easier said than done, I hear you thinking. Well, if you say so. Actually, the only reason why anything is difficult is because we believe it is. All of our power is in our perception, and therefore the simple act of just stopping for a moment to trust that the right place and right time is right now, your perception will shift, and so will your entire world.
Dr. Wayne Dyer says, "Anything that has been accomplished by any other human being in the physical realm is within the field of possibility." All we have to do is take a good look around and see that we have the power to be, do and have it all. We dreamt about the moon, and then we put a man up there. We wanted to fly and we took to the sky in airplanes and connected across the earth. We are all a possibility waiting to awaken. And how do we do this?
Next time you find yourself doubting an experience, your past, a decision you made, an action you took, or a gut feeling that you are having…STOP. Just simply become aware that you are creating your own limitation, and all you have to do is trust that this moment right now holds all possibility, and will in fact, unfold perfectly in a way that is for your highest good, and for the good of all. All that is possible is in your hands now, trust it.
Sky Sheridan is founder of the conscious Adventure, Called2Create. Find out how to empower your thoughts, feelings and beliefs about yourself, others and the world by clicking here: www.Called2Create.com and awaken your creative capacity and infinite potential now.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
--posted by monkeyinpajamas on May 15, 2010
Arriving in a new city last Thursday, I had the strangest first week of graduate school. I fell and broke my leg within 48 hours of arriving there! I was really amazed by the kindness shown by my new roommate, someone who I had only just met. "We are family now", she said when she found me lying in my room with a swollen leg, unable to move, in a strange city with no family except across three oceans.
She took me to the student health center by cab to get my leg examined. The cab driver was so nice and said to me how lucky I was to have a friend like that. After that, my roommate didn't stop helping me - she made me amazing meals and brought them to and made me comfortable despite my insistence that I could do things on my own. When I protested, "I really like helping people", she said , "I believe what goes around always comes around..." and this was from someone who I had been paired with randomly!
I was seriously touched by the kindness of everyone - the girl in the elevator, people on the bus, the doctors and nurses - people who were so considerate and concerned. Feeling lonely and homesick, so many blessings I never expected came my way.
The small acts stayed in my mind - the bus shuttle drivers gave me the luxury of being picked up from any point where and made sure I could get the connections to wherever I needed to go... or the many people who held the door open for me - small things that were incredibly hard with crutches. In whatever way I could, I tried to repay the universe for its blessings.
Inspired by a story I read on DailyGood (the man who does magic with his crutches), I tried to make people laugh. I made a ton of silly jokes about my situation - ranging from "it's good practice for the ski season" to "I think my brain kind of took the term 'Fall Semester' too seriously" ! Either to other people or even in my mind I tried not to complain a single time about what happened. I clowned around with my crutches and tried not to feel bad about my leg even though I was in a lot of pain.
"I'm so proud of you", the nurse said, "We don't have many students who are so cheerful after a bad fall." I began noticing other students on crutches - I never knew there were so many students with broken legs! I tried to be very considerate towards them now that I was in the same situation. I took time to smile and chat with a paraplegic girl in a wheelchair who I noticed always ate lunch alone.
I realized soon enough that pain can be diminished by mental strength. The metaphorical value of using crutches and getting rid of them soon enough was not lost either. I could see that although for some time I was using physical crutches, there are a hundred of mental crutches I desperately cling on to. Sometimes the worst situations are also sometimes blessings, chances to witness great kindness from the universe.
Like the quote by Einstein, "You can move through life seeing nothing as a miracle, or seeing everything as a miracle." My first week of grad school, I was made to attend a class that I never signed up for - A Course in Miracles.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
by Peter Comrie
We live in a world where we have so many magnificent things for which to be grateful, where we can grow to appreciate the sheer miracle of being alive, and where we get to live by the power of our "choice" and not merely instinct. Now, when you spend just a moment thinking about that, you have to agree, it's a pretty amazing thing, this "living" business.
Yes I know, sometimes "stuff" can cause us to forget the wonder of who and what we really are, and we at times can feel "invalidated". The video below is just the ticket for turning the whole deal on its head. You're going to love this, and please share it with someone you know who needs it. You know who!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
By George Kunnath
We are in the moment like the wind. Everything is "now" - it changes all the time like the wind. The wind blows all the time - from a gentle murmur of a breeze to a hurricane. Sometimes it is a cool gentle breeze; other times it is a strong wind; yet other times it is a whirlwind; some other times it becomes a storm and some other times a hurricane; between them it is movement and in the center is always moments of stillness.
The dancer is all the time in a still moment depicting grace and beauty; rhythm and balance. The perfect dancer is in absolute stillness, in perfect balance and harmony with the wonder of the Universe. The musician creates breathtaking melodies from the depth of stillness while it flows through his flute or reverberates from the depth of his being. Soul stirring music always rises from stillness and merges with absolute stillness.
The nature is always still; the universe is still and harmonious. The heart of all matter is still. Life is still; all life forms are still amidst apparent chaos. It is a paradox. The mute question is how one can be still or attain this stillness with nature in a turbulent and strife torn world? The answer is that there is no instant pill or quick fix solution. One needs to begin by going back to nature. Be in nature by observing and listening. Tune in with the rustling of the wind, songs of the birds, warmth and colors of the sunrays, listening to the waves of the sea, seeing the mountainous landscapes. Watch the changing of seasons. Everything in nature happens in stillness - whether the birth of a new life or mass destruction and chaos. Out of stillness emerges everything. At the root of everything is nothingness. The infinite source of everything is nothingness and this nothingness is all deep stillness.
When we are still, we merge with nature, the Universe, and the Absolute. We go with the wind; we fly with the birds; we float with the waves; we stand with the trees, rise and set with the sun and moon. We change with the seasons; we flow with the rivers; we shine with the stars and orbit with the planets. We are no longer separate from the universe; we become one with everything in the universe glowing in the beauty and wonder of the universe. Our life becomes very simple and we are in paradise.
The beauty of stillness is indescribable; it has to be listened to, felt and experienced; it has to be lived in the wonder of the Universe. Stillness is everything; it is love, joy, peace, energy, power. It is life. Stillness is life in its fullest.
In search of true, peace, happiness and freedom, George Kunnath moved out of a successful corporate career to pursue a new way of life. The search for Source began a long time ago when he as a teenager left his home in a Kerala village (India) to join priesthood. However along the way he changed course from a protected environment to live in an uncertain world. He loves adventure in nature. His passion today is to understand energy processes in the universe and he wants to network with people who are in pursuit of creating balance and harmony in the world, including the areas of learning, personal effectiveness, coaching and mentoring. Email George at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Friday, May 7, 2010
by Peter Comrie
As we wrap up this wonderful week here in the Okanagan Valley I'm reflecting on a few chats I've recently had about "legacy". You know, the stuff we leave behind, and how we might be remembered.
It got me seriously thinking about my own "legacy", and lo, I resolved to live it out while I'm still here. I realized that it's really not that important to me to spend a bunch of time thinking about what is going to go on after my time on this spinning jewel. So I've decided to use my remaining time living the thing I would want to be remembered for.
Today's video offering may help you decide your own "Living Legacy".
New York Times best-selling author Amy Krouse Rosenthal considers the big questions: what constitutes a meaningful life, who are we, what makes the world go round? Her answer is....
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
by Annette Estes
One of the best ways to begin improving your leadership style is to emulate successful leaders. So, I asked a number of executive and community leaders I know to give me their definition of leadership and what they think are the qualities in a good leader.
There were so many responses, I couldn’t fit them all into one article. Here’s the first in a series of three articles on leadership qualities.
Bill Bonnstetter, Founder of Target Training International in Scottsdale, Arizona, is brief and to the point. Bonnstetter says, “Great leaders have mastered these personal skills: Goal Orientation, the Art of Influence, Self-Management, Interpersonal Skills, and Personal Accountability.”
Mike Etheridge, COO of Brenner Oil Company in Holland, Michigan, believes “Great leaders are born. If one is to be a good leader, focus, goals and the successful accomplishment of those goals needs to be added to the recipe. Great leaders have a sense of knowing what to do when that chapter of the ‘How To’ book has not been written yet. So many great leaders get on the other side of a crisis or project and ask, ‘Where did that come from?’ It is this special ability along with the persistence, focus, motivation, example and loving commitment, coupled with the assistance of associates that have grown from good to great in their respective positions, that will in the judgment of history, make a great leader.”
When he was alive, the late James D. Cockman, former Chairman of Sara Lee Foods Food Services Division, told me that great leadership involves, “Compassion, caring, trust. Integrity is the foundation. People do not care how much you know until they know how much you CARE.”
Larry Bonorato, General Manager of Saturn of Greenville writes, “A leader must give totally honest feedback to the individuals on his/her team as soon as possible. Each team member must know exactly where they stand, what is expected of them, and what they must do to meet the expectations of the leader. The leaders should seek out and get input from the individual team members. However, the leader makes the decision based on what is best for the team. A leader cannot have a ‘bad day.’ If the leader is depressed, he/she should stay home. The speed of the leader is the speed of the team.”
Gil Gerretsen, President and Head Coach of BizTrek Intl., Inc. writes, “Those who are truly successful exhibit two important characteristics which puts them in rare company. First, they must carry a ‘command presence.’ They exude a certain panache that makes it clear they are in charge and are comfortable being in that role. This cannot be faked. Second, they have a mental time horizon beyond today, this week or even next month. In the military, the difference between a private and a general is often their time horizon. A general is thinking and planning for things years down the road while a private mainly thinks about today and then the next paycheck.”
Gary Ault, Publisher of the Greenville Magazine and South Carolina Magazine says, “One common thread each of our Nelson Mullins Business Person of the year honorees have always had is their own ‘guiding principle’ by which they live. Leadership is all about values, attitude, commitment, enthusiasm, motivation, vision, and teamwork. Leadership is also about self-responsibility. Never point at others to blame for things that happen to you, look only inwardly for positive action and results. Always take responsibility in your business and private lives.”
Elizabeth Belenchia, President of Carroll Properties Corporation in Spartanburg believes, “A good leader is empathetic, poised with a vision, delegates unique requirement to those impassioned to complete their part of the mission (with minimal supervision). Leading requires knowing the strengths of the leader and each team member. Leadership brings out the best in the entire team. It creates a harmonized group.”
An excellent way to determine the characteristics of your leadership style is to develop your own personal leadership style inventory. Do a DISC assessment that defines your behavioral style and a personal values assessment that shows your attitude toward leadership and what motivates you.
Then have those you manage do the same assessments. If you’re one of your company’s managers responsible for motivating their employees, these tools will have people pointing at you when someone wants to know what makes a good leader.
What better way to determine the qualities of a good leader than by asking successful leaders to give their definition of leadership? Here are several responses in the first of three articles on leadership.You can get a free leadership skills assessment by going to http://www.coachannette.com and clicking in the upper right corner. Annette Estes is a Certified Professional Behavioral and Values Analyst and coach who can help you develop your executive leadership skills. An excellent resource for managers is Annette’s ebook, Why Can’t You See it MY Way? Resolving Values Conflicts at Work and Home, which you can order at http://www.resolveconflictnow.com Contact her at Annette@CoachAnnette.com or call The Estes Group at 864-244-1156.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
by Peter Comrie
Last fall I had the distinct pleasure to be in the company of a young lady that is destined to become one very impactful contributor and leader in the emerging reality of our planet.
Kelowna, British Columbia is the home of Olivia Typusiak, a gregarious and highly talented teenager who, along with the young lady featured in today's video offering, are representative of the power that exists in today's youth. These young folks inspire me to believe that the world isn't going to hell in a handbasket, and in their bright and capable hands many future generations will be led to believe that their value and contribution is truly immense.
I congratulate them all as I see them emerge as Full Spectrum Leaders. You will enjoy the very delightful Adora Svitak.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
by Mike Robbins
I first heard the phrase “act as if” about fifteen or twenty years ago. I remember learning that if we “act as if” we already have something we want, “act as if” something is already occurring in our lives (even if it’s not), or “act as if” we know how to do something (even if we don’t) – we create the conditions for it to manifest in our life with greater easy and probability.
In recent years, this concept has been popularized and even mainstreamed by books, films, and teachers talking about the “law of attraction” (i.e. like attracts like, thoughts create things, we get what we focus on, etc.)
This past week Michelle and I watched a wonderfully inspiring documentary film called Act As If, which had a profound impact on me. The film is about Kathy Delaney-Smith, the head women’s basketball coach at Harvard University. Kathy, who comes from a working class background and didn’t have much basketball or coaching experience, used the power of “acting as if” to become a very successful coach at one of the most elite institutions in the world. She has also used her “act as if” philosophy to teach, train, and inspire her players both on the off the court for the past thirty years.
Most poignantly, Kathy used the power of her mind and her thoughts to act as if she were healthy and strong as she successfully battled through a life-threatening bout of breast cancer. Her story, strength, and attitude are inspiring and courageous.
The message of this film spoke to me on a few different levels. First of all, it brought the worlds of sports and the power of our thoughts and intention together in a meaningful way, which I appreciated. Second, Kathy’s personal story and her approach with her players are both important things we can benefit from, learn from, and take to heart (in business, parenting, teamwork, relationships, and life in general). And, finally, it reminded me how important it is to be conscious of my thoughts, my intentions, and my beliefs.
As I’ve been reflecting on it more, I realize that although I understand the concept of “acting as if” and I write, speak, and teach about how we have the power to create our own reality, in certain areas of my life – especially the ones that are most important to me or the ones where I feel the most cynical and resigned, I often pay “lip service” to acting as if, while simply hoping things will get better, worrying that they won’t, or allowing the outcome to determine how optimistic or pessimistic my outlook and approach will be.
This has been a sobering, but important realization for me this week. There is a big difference between knowing something and living it.
“Acting as if” is about believing in things that don’t currently exist and that there may not be much evidence for. This is about living a “faith-based” life, not an “evidence-based life.” The term “faith-based” often gets used in a political, social, or moral context when talking about initiatives or organizations that are connected with the church or some specific organized religion. However, being a faith-based person, while it can and often does encompass our religious beliefs and our spiritual practices, is even broader than this.
When we choose to live with a strong faith in things not seen, not proven, and not guaranteed – we tap into the power of the possible and we supersede the literal and predicable.
Wayne Dyer wrote a great book a number of years ago called You’ll See it When You Believe it. So many of us, myself included, live important aspect of our lives with the silent mantra of “I’ll believe it when I see it” and in doing so we hold ourselves back, limit what’s possible, and negate the power of our mind, imagination, and intention to allow and create things, situations, experiences, and outcomes that are new, unpredictable, and even miraculous.
For some of us the idea of “acting as if” is basic and fundamental, for others of us it may be new and/or more difficult, and for still others it may seem out there and quite esoteric. Regardless of how we relate to this idea, we’ve all experienced it in our lives in big and small ways. Kathy Delaney-Smith demonstrates it in the Act As If film in a powerful way through her coaching, her battle with cancer, and how she lives life.
The question for us to ask ourselves is, “What am I acting as if will happen in the most important areas of my life right now?”
We often get exactly what we expect – which is a pretty powerful concept if we take time to let it in and live with that awareness. Instead of waiting to see how things turn out, hoping that they will get better, or simply allowing the circumstances and situations in our lives determine how we feel – what if we acted as if we had everything within us and around us that we need to be successful, happy, and fulfilled already – which we do, by the way!
Mike Robbins is a sought-after motivational keynote speaker, coach, and the bestselling author of Focus on the Good Stuff (Wiley) and Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken (Wiley). More info - www.Mike-Robbins.com