The Calm Within!

Hello there all and welcome to the typical weeks end. As is our usual way we offer a video to wind up the week.

Today's offering is especially poignant as we often here use metaphors to magnify the message. This particular video is chock block full of amazing metaphors that reflect how many folks have lived their lives.

Dewey Bozella was locked up for 26 years - a lifetime - for a crime he did not commit. This story is about the triumph of human spirit and living proof of the maxim: "never give up". One man's journey to reclaim his life, against all odds; a man fighting his biggest fight outside the boxing ring without any hatred or bitterness towards the system. Dewey Bozella - courageous, persistent, human and finally...free.

The question I have for you to contemplate this weekend is, how have you been the prosecutor, witness, judge and jury in your own life, and also the jailer that has kept your magnificence locked up in solitary confinement?

Could it be time for you to set yourself free? Think about it and let me know what pops up for you as you discover:

The Calm Within!

 

Have an wonder-full weekend.

See you on Monday.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

You are all full of it!

As my outside ages, my intention is to become stunningly beautiful on the inside.
~ Tamara Gerlach

Energy, that is... we all have access to an unlimited supply of Love and Light to wake-up, shake-up, and inspire everyone, including yourself!

Our bodies literally have electromagnetic functions going on all of the time, keeping our heart pumping, and our brain and body working on the physical level. On the Emotional and Spiritual levels, we sometimes create blockages, allow energy drains, or even let our light fade over time.

Let's practice ways of turning it WAY up! Let's create an abundant flow of energy that improves our life and creates a positive impact on everyone and everything around us.

Think of your energy as currency in a "Radiance account". You can try to hoard it and keep it for yourself (an option, but not recommended). You can play it safe and use just enough to maintain the status quo (again, not recommended). OR, you can tap into a never-ending supply of aliveness.

Through daily practice, you'll have enough energy to do, be, and have everything you want AND plenty to share with others. Being conscious of how much energy we have in our Radiance account and how to most wisely invest it to create abundance allows us to trust ourselves not to "overdraw" our account.

Your Radiant Mind Account
Go inside. Through practicing meditation, reflecting inward, or doing daily check-ins, we can clear any thoughts that are blocking our energy. It's like taking the "hold" off of your Radiance account.

Your mind IS your friend, if you free it once in awhile.

Your Radiant Body Account
Move. Your body is full of wisdom and energy resources. When you express yourself physically, you open up and create even more energy. So, whether it's dancing, enjoying a bike ride, or simply stretching, you can turn up your light anytime.

Radiance does not come in a can of "energy drink" or a 16 oz. quadruple espresso caramel macchiato.

Your Radiant Spirit Account
Once you have released any stuckness in your mind and body, you have a clear channel to tap into the Divine. Oh, doesn't that just sound wonderful? When you consciously step into your FULL power and come from your highest-self everyday, you become unstoppable. Wherever you put your energy will expand. You can't help but be successful because you are in the flow of all that is and you light up every aspect of your life.

Here's the coolest part: once you start living from this place of energy abundance, it's nearly impossible to turn it off! Of course we can over-do it and get tired, but I've actually tested this. I ask truly radiant people if they are able to turn off their light. They try to change the look on their face, or think negative thoughts, but they still radiate big, powerful energy.

Once you turn on your Radiant life, there is no going back.

Tamara has taught, mentored, and coached thousands of people to create freedom and cultivate radiance since 1982. Tam brings her light, creativity, experience as an entrepreneur, former National Team Coach for USA Gymnastics, author, speaker, and life and business coach into everything she does. Get to know Tamara at: CultivatingRadiance.com

The Power of One!

Good day to you and welcome to the weeks end. It's Friday and we wrap up the week with a short video offering.

This Sunday, October 2 marks both the United Nations' International Day of Non-Violence, and the birthday of one of its biggest proponents: Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. Today we pay tribute to the concept and the man by re-introducing you to the "Power of One." We honor the values and practice of the nonviolent civil actions that changed a nation -- and indeed, the world. These folks truly are Full Spectrum Leaders.....in action.

This weekend give some thought to the "Power of One.....You". Are you using your amazing gifts to make this jewel in space a better place for yourself, your loved ones, and just because you can.

See you on Monday.

Have a wonder-filled weekend.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

Your Next Step?

Hello there and welcome to Thursday. I got some very interesting feedback on yesterday's posting About Forgiveness, and it was very clear to me that the subject is one that will inspire amazing personal growth for many.

It was evident to me that here at Full Spectrum Leadership we can serve our community here on this blog by occasionally bringing this delicate subject more to the forefront of considerations about leadership in every aspect of life.

Without even mentioning the word, our friend Catherine hits the the nail directly as she reflects on:

Your Next Step?
by Catherine Ryan Hyde

The problem with a fallback position is that you tend to fall back. ~ Author unknown

There's a little mountain in a state park near my home. It gains about 1,500 feet in two miles. So, four miles round trip. About two hours out of my life, not counting the drive. Even if you wouldn't take this hike today you can probably accept that you could work up to it.

I'd estimate that in the past eight years I've climbed this one little mountain 40 times. I've done lots of other mountains. More dramatic ones. Mt. Katahdin in Maine. The Grand Canyon, rim-to-river and back. Half Dome. The Inca Trail to Machu Picchu. But I'm putting the others aside for this illustration. I'm just concentrating on 40 trips up that one 1,500-foot mountain. The cumulative elevation is the equivalent of hiking from sea level to the top of Mount Everest. Twice.

If you had asked me eight years ago if I could climb as high as two Mount Everests, I would have said, "Of course not. No one can." But I could, and I did. It just took me eight years to do it.

It sometimes seems that we-both as individuals and as a society-don't put enough value on gradual, deliberate progress. In my opinion it's how most genuine human progress is made: very slowly, one step at a time.

When we say we can't do something, we really mean we can't do it right now. Better to do it over the course of eight years than not at all.

When we say we can't change the world, we really mean we can't change it completely. Better to change it a little than not even to try.

We want to leap, or fly, to the top of the mountain, but we almost never can. But we can get there, if we want it badly enough. It just involves thousands, sometimes tens of thousands, of small steps.

Here's something I find helpful: I try to avoid the very human temptation to keep looking up at the summit, gauging its distance. That sets off a torrent of negative internal voices.

Instead I try to return my focus to the current step. The summit is almost always overwhelming. The next step almost never is. So I take the step. Then I take another. And another.

And when I do stop to gauge my progress, I don't look up. I turn around and look behind me. At how high I've already climbed. That sets off a very different internal dialogue. It's amazing how those little steps add up.

Next time you feel overwhelmed by the sheer height of a figurative mountain, try coming back into the moment. Don't look up. Just take the step in front of you, and the one after that, and the one after that. When you do finally turn and look back at where you started, I think you'll be amazed at how high you've climbed.



Catherine Ryan Hyde is the author of 18 published and forthcoming books. Older works include the story collection Earthquake Weather, and the novels Funerals for Horses, Pay it Forward, Electric God, and Walter's Purple Heart.

Pay It Forward was adapted into a major motion picture, chosen by the American Library Association for its Best Books for Young Adults list, and translated into more than 23 languages for distribution in over 30 countries. The mass market paperback was released in October 2000 by Pocket Books and quickly became a national bestseller. It is still in print, and was rereleased in a trade paperback edition in April of 2010.

She is founder and former president (2000-2009) of the Pay It Forward Foundation. Get to know Catherine at: cryanhyde.com

About Forgiveness!

Good day there and welcome to the midweek point. It seems many of my chats of the past few days have needed to have the subject of "forgiveness" injected in to them. In the arena of leadership and personal responsibility, this is a subject that we address often.

Oh yes, we all know that lack of forgiveness is a bit like us taking the poison hoping someone else suffers the consequences. And yet still, many great folks are cobbled by their unwillingness to embrace the truth of great rewards that must come with forgiveness.

Our friend and Full Spectrum Leader, Mark Nepo, reflects on the issue in one of the most profound ways I have ever read. You appreciate what he has to say:

About Forgiveness!
By Mark Nepo

The pain was necessary to know the truth but we don’t have to keep the pain alive to keep the truth alive.

This is what has kept me from forgiveness: the feeling that all I’ve been through will evaporate if I don’t relive it; that if those who hurt me don’t see what they’ve done, my suffering will have been for nothing. In this, the stone I through in the lake knows more that I. Its ripples vanish.

What it really comes down to is the clearness of the heart to stop defining who I am by those who have hurt me and to take up the risk to love myself, to validate my own existence, pain and all, from the center out.

As anyone who has been wronged can attest, in order to keep the fire for justice burning, we need to keep burning our wounds open as perpetual evidence. Living like this, it is impossible to heal. Living like this we become our own version of Prometheus, having our innards eaten daily by some large bird of woundedness.

Forgiveness has deeper rewards that excusing someone for how they have hurt us. The deeper healing comes in the exchange of our resentments for inner freedom. At last, the wound, even if never acknowledged by the other person, can heal, and our life can continue.

It is useful to realize that the word forgive originally meant both to give and receive – to “give for.” In keeping with the original meaning, we can see that the inner reward for forgiveness is the exchange of life, the give and take between our soul and the Universe.

It is hard to comprehend how this works, yet the mystery of true forgiveness waits in letting go of our ledgers of injustice and retribution in order to regain the feeling in our heart. We can only hope to begin this exchange today, now, by forgiving what is broken in each other and imagining through love how these holy pieces go together.

Mark Nepo is a poet and philosopher who has taught in the fields of poetry and spirituality for over thirty years. A New York Times #1 bestselling author, he has published twelve books and recorded six audio projects. Recent work includes a new book of teaching stories, As Far As the Heart Can See, (HCI Books, audio book by Simon & Schuster, Sept 2011), Finding Inner Courage (Conari, 2011, originally published as Facing the Lion, Being the Lion, 2007), audio books of The Book of Awakening and Finding Inner Courage (CD Box Sets, Simon & Schuster, 2011), and Staying Awake (CD Box Set, Sounds True, February 2012). His most recent book of poetry is Surviving Has Made Me Crazy (CavanKerry Press, 2007). As a cancer survivor, Mark devotes his writing and teaching to the journey of inner transformation and the life of relationship. You can get to know him better at: http://www.marknepo.com

Who Are You Today?

by Roslyn Franken

Don’t let your ‘not now’ become your ‘never’.
~ Roslyn Franken

Let go of your past challenges. Accept who you are today. Look forward to each new tomorrow with a renewed sense of hope, faith and enthusiasm. Your past challenges do not dictate your future. If you keep looking in the rearview mirror of life, you will miss out on all the wonderful possibilities that lie ahead. Decide where you want to go, who you want to be and follow the path to take you there.

If the path is unclear, just take the first step and know that the next step will present itself. It may not be what you planned or expected, but trust that it will be what is best.

Accepting who you are today means forgiving yourself for past mistakes and imperfections. It is only when you can accept the reality of your today that you can move forward to a better tomorrow. Renewing your hope, faith and enthusiasm daily is what makes life worth living.

Be careful not to constantly do things to please others at the expense of getting your own needs, wants and desires met. Your needs, wants and desires are no less and no more important than anyone else's. This means knowing what is truly important to you and learning to say 'no' to others.

Know your values and know your boundaries. Learn to communicate them. People won't know your boundaries and where you stand if you don't make these clear.

It's easy to get so caught up in our never-ending To-Do lists and problems to solve that we neglect the things that are most important to us such as our health, relationships and overall sense of well-being. Make your health, relationships and well-being top priorities in your life.

Being kind to others is noble and wonderful. So is being kind to yourself. Try it sometime and you'll see. It feels a lot better than the constant judgment, criticism and self-abuse we do to ourselves. It's time to leave that self-critic behind and make room for a kinder and gentler inner voice.

Life can change on a dime. If there's something you want to do in your life, don't keep putting it off. You may say 'not now' and perhaps you're right, it's not the ideal time. But the ideal time may never come. As Martin Luther said, 'How soon not now becomes never'.

Whether you want to lose weight and get in shape, quit smoking, or climb Mount Everest, you can put off the things you want for only so long. Don't let YOUR 'not now' become YOUR 'never'.

She beat cancer at 29. At 39 she won her battles with food, weight and lifestyle challenges. She is Roslyn Franken, author of The A List: 9 Guiding Principles for Healthy Eating and Positive Living. Roslyn engages, educates and enlightens others with her A List principles through her motivational speaking and weight loss coaching programs. She is also host of the How to Thrive After 35 Radio Show and teleseminar series and co-author of Death Can Wait: Stories from Cancer Survivors.
Roslyn is happily married to Elliott Smith, a professional magician, and enjoys portraiture, the healing arts, cooking and song writing. Visit Roslyn at: roslynfranken.com

Our Choices!

by Bevin Lynch

If I'm always doing the best I can, I'm bringing my best self to the very next moment. And that's all anyone can ask for.

Life is a series of choices. Choose to be happy. Choose to live your dream. Choose to live in the present moment. Choose to love with all your heart.

But what happens when the choice seems impossible? What happens when you can't figure out what is the "right" answer?

When I was 14, I faced a choice that seemed so difficult that I tore myself apart trying to figure out what was the right way to go. While the decision itself seems fairly trivial looking back, the wisdom that came out of it has stayed with me every day.

After three hours of debating with my dad about what to do, he said to me, "You make the best decision you can with the information you have at hand. If in six months or six weeks or six days you make a different decision, it's not that today's decision was wrong. You simply have more information and you are making the best decision you can with the information you have at the time."

These simple sentences have erased regret from my life. I know that I wouldn't be where I am today without the decisions that I have made along the way.

Several years later I went to visit my dad in the hospital, where he was undergoing chemo for advanced lung cancer. While he was taking a nap I wrote him a letter, talking about the most important conversations we'd had and the memories that I cherished. As I left, I decided to hand it to him, rather than mail it from home in Chicago. The next day he called to say how much that letter meant to him.

That was the last time I spoke to him. He passed away early the next day. My decision to live in the present moment ensured that I have no doubt my dad knew exactly how much I loved him.

Within the past few years, I've spent much of my time studying happiness and well-being, discovering more and more that happiness is a choice. Well-being and happiness are innate, they are our natural states.

I've found that the less I do to chase after these states, the more I rest in them; the more that they support and take care of me, rather than the other way around. I've learned that there is no "Magic Tuesday" when everything falls into place and there are no more bumps in the road.

The only moment we have any impact or effect on is the moment we are currently in and that is where we must make our decisions from.

In Don Miguel Ruiz's book The Four Agreements, his fourth agreement is "Always Do Your Best." I love the caveat to this - Always do your best... and no more.

At any moment in our lives, we are doing the best that we can. We are making the best decision we can, with the information we have at hand. And, knowing that there is no moment of perfection that we are working towards, every moment is perfect just as it is.

Bevin is the creator of The Well-Being Expo, speaker, business and life coach and host of Creating The Life You Love to Live Radio show. Visit Bevin at: BevinLynch.com

Authenticity: Are you sometimes afraid to be yourself?

Shared by Full Spectrum Leader Margie Warrell

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best to make you everybody but yourself means to fight the hardest battle any human being can fight – and to never stop.” – e.e. cummings

Are you hiding behind a mask?

If you didn’t need to prove yourself to anyone nor care whether people “approved” of you, how would you be different?

Daniel Goleman’s research in Emotional Intelligence found that we human beings are wired for connection. We not only want to belong, we need to belong, and so we are at our best when we feel connected to those around us. We like to be appreciated, enjoy admiration and crave to feel significant in the hearts and minds of those around us. Too often though, in our quest to feel significant, we forfeit expressing our individuality, limit our vulnerability and don a mask intended to garner greater admiration and ward off the possibility of rejection. In the process we lose touch with what makes us special, disconnect from authenticity and give up what makes us someone who others feel they can really connect to.

As we let go striving for approval and courageously embrace our vulnerability, we grow into the uniquely one-of-a-kind person we really are.

Social psychologists have found that two out of three people are dramatically out of touch with how they see themselves compared to how others see them. The irony being that people who strive the hardest to be liked or to impress others often have just the opposite effect on those around them. Most of us have an inbuilt “realness” detector that starts going off when we find ourselves in the company of someone who seems to lack it (sometimes called a “B.S. Detector”). We can sniff out insincerity, inauthenticity, and practiced charm a mile away. Our innate ability to sense incongruence extends beyond anything we can really explain. We just know that the person we are with is hiding some aspect of who they are, limiting our desire and/or ability to develop a stronger relationship with them. That is of course that we aren’t totally preoccupied with our own masquerade… which can so easily happen. I know how easy it can happen because I know how often I catch myself focused more on “What will people think?” instead of “What feels true?”

The irony is that the less we strive to have people to like us, the more they actually do. As we let go striving to get the approval and learn to sit with our vulnerability, we grow into the person we really are. In a world that has so much focus on the superficial, people crave authenticity, yearn for ‘realness,’ and can’t help but find themselves seeking the company of those who are comfortable in their own skin. And if you are someone who is in a position of leadership, authenticity makes you so much more approachable, trusted and influential. People trust people who can share their struggles, their doubts, their fears, their hopes and their heartaches; people who don’t need to prove their superiority, their success or their significance in any way.

“To be oneself is more admirable that the easy cowardice of surrender to conformity” – Irving Wallace

So why is it that so many people find it difficult to simply be who they are? As I wrote in my book Find Your Courage (in the chapter titled “The Courage To Be Yourself”), in a world that pressures for conformity, one of the greatest challenges we all face is to be ourselves. Because when all we do is try to fit in, we negate the difference our difference makes. When all we do is try to conform, all we have to offer is conformity. And when all we do is try to impress, we tend to repel instead. The fact is that if you have an unquenchable need to impress others in order to feel good about yourself, you will never be able to impress them enough. Give up having your sense of your own worth be contingent on the worth others place on you. Who you are is far more than any person’s opinion.

In Zen Buddhism they speak of living with one’s “original face.” Buddhists describe our “original face” as being relaxed, without tension, free of pretension, devoid of masks, or airs and graces of superficiality. And so your “original face” is the one that shines through when you find your courage to embrace the one-of-a-kind imperfect human being that you are, however vulnerable that makes you feel. As Brene Brown wrote in her book “The Gifts of Imperfection,” “ordinary courage is about putting our vulnerability on the line.”

Refusing to conform isn’t always easy. We have to accept that some people may not like us. Some may criticize us. And some may reject us outright. Full self-expression demands vulnerability. But it’s through vulnerability that we connect most deeply. Whether as leaders or lovers or strugglers just hoping to know more joy and connect more deeply, there is so much to gain by dropping the mask, letting go our fear of “not being good enough,” and accepting that who we are is always “good enough.” Always.

So I would like you to ask yourself these two questions and reflect on the answer that comes back to you:

i) If I were to let go of the need to prove my worthiness and my fear of not being “good enough,” how would I show up differently in the world?

ii) What mask am I most afraid to put down? Why?

iii) How has wearing this mask impacted my life?

Mother Teresa, a woman respected the world over for her courage and total lack of pretension, once said, “Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” Or to quote from a slightly more quirky character, Dr. Seuss: Be who you are. Because those who mind don’t matter. And those who matter don’t mind.

Stay real. The world needs more people with the courage to be who they are.



An intrepid Australian, Margie Warrell is a bestselling author, master certified coach, media personality and dynamic speaker who empowers people globally to live more courageous lives.

The bestselling author of Find Your Courage (McGraw-Hill), Warrell has learned a lot about courage since her childhood growing up as one of seven children on a farm in rural Australia, to becoming an emerging leader in the human potential movement. Visit her at: http://margiewarrell.com

Say Something Nice

Yes, it's Friday, the week winds up, and the promise of a late summer weekend lies before us.

As is our usual process we conclude the week with a short video, and as you go into your weekend I asking you to consider the message in today's offering.

In New York City a few folks from Improv Everywhere constructed a custom wooden lectern with a megaphone holster and an attached sign that read: "Say Something Nice." The lectern was placed in public spaces around New York and then left alone. What would happen when passerbys were given the opportunity to amplify their voices to "say something nice"?

Watch and find out, and remember to: Say Something Nice

Have a terrific weekend.

See you on Monday.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

The Secrets of Time

Shared by Dr. Alan R. Zimmerman

"Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator." --Robert Orben

The great business philosopher, Jim Rohn observed, "Time is our most valuable asset, yet we tend to waste it, kill it, and spend it rather than invest it." That's sad ... because you don't get a second chance to use it. Your first shot is your last one. You get one crack - and one crack only - at using any given period of time. And if you screw it up, too bad. There are no do-overs.

By contrast, I've noticed that the happiest people and the most successful are almost always very skilled in the way they invest their time. Oh sure, they get the same amount of time as anyone else, 24 hours a day, and not a minute more. But you can be certain that the way they think about time - and the way they allocate time - is very different than the way negative, demotivated people approach it.

To make sure you're investing your time wisely, there are 4 things you've got to do...

1. Don't spend too much time in the past.
That would be about as foolish as trying to drive a car that had a rear-view mirror that was bigger than the windshield. You would probably crash. And the same goes for time. If you live your life in the past, you're going to crash the present. You're going to ruin it.

The past only serves two purposes. It provides lessons and preserves memories. So pick up the lessons from your past. Reflect on your good memories once in a while. And then get on with the present. As author Ida Scott Taylor wrote in the early 1900's, "One day at a time -- this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has yet to come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering."

2. Spend the "right" amount of time on the future.
The key is the "right" amount of time. If you spend too little time, you're living your life on auto-pilot. You're living your life without purpose and goals ... and that will never lead to happiness or success. If you spend too much time on the future, dreaming about how good life could be ... if only certain things would happen ... you once again miss the present.

You're living your life in a fantasy world, rather than working on making it happen. Of course, I know the "right" amount of time may be somewhat of a dilemma. The comedian Jerry Seinfeld commented on that. He said, "I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication ... Not easy. There's an entire wall of products that you need. You stand there going, 'Well, this one is quick acting but this is long lasting ... Which is more important, the present or the future?'"

Well, Jerry, I can answer that for you. The present is more important ... because what you do in the present determines your future. The Chinese knew that hundreds of years ago. As stated in one of their ancient proverbs, "If you want to know your past, look into your present conditions. If you want to know your future, look into your present actions."

3. Focus on the present.
As I tell my audiences, "Wherever you are, be there!" Don't fret about work when you're at home, and don't worry about the kids when you're at work. Learn to be totally present.

The great conductor Arturo Toscanini mastered the skill. On his 80th birthday, someone asked his son Walter what his father ranked as his most important achievement. The son replied, "For him there can be no such thing. Whatever he happens to be doing at the moment is the biggest thing in his life -- whether it is conducting a symphony or peeling an orange."

Indeed, learning to live in the "now" may be critical to your success. As change expert Price Pritchett puts it, "Fast growth requires ... a strong sense of 'now-ness.'" You have to maximize the value of the moment.

As Pritchett goes on to say, "Pay attention. Consciously watch how you're spending the fleeting now, and consider the payback you'll get. Are you making a good investment of your hours and minutes? Or are you wasting these scarce resources ... spending time on stuff that offers little return ... fumbling the opportunity for fast growth?"

You need to show great respect for the now. If you fill it with right behaviors, you'll be rewarded with fast results. And finally,

4. Adopt the mind set of living in the present.
Now I know that's easier said than done ... that we all need to live in the present. But it can be done, if you reflect on a few slogans throughout your day. In fact, you can even write them down, put them on a card, and read the card three or four times a day.

And thanks to the millions of people who have gone through 12-step programs or other recovery programs, these slogans have been time tested and proven to work. So give them a try. They'll keep you focused on the present.

• Easy does it.
• First things first.
• How important is it?
• Just for today.
• Keep it simple.
• Keep an open mind.
• Let go and let God.
• Let it begin with me.
• Listen and learn.
• Live and let live.
• One day at a time.
• Progress not perfection.

Yes, the more you reflect on these slogans, the easier it will be for you to live your life to the fullest ... in the present. And if you want to get real technical about it, the present is the only time you have anyway.

As mentioned in "The 500 Year Delta" by Jim Taylor and Watts Wacker, "Once upon a time, you could live in three tenses -- the past, the present, and the future. There was a time to consult history; there was a time to plan to what lay ahead. The present tense was spent managing the transfer of the past into the future and imagining what that future might be."

They continue, "Today, under the pressure of accelerating change, the past and future have been fused into a single tense: the present. The present is real time and real time is the only time."

Action:
Which of the living-in-the-present slogans appeals to you the most? Pick one. And then repeat that slogan to yourself several times a day for at least 30 days in a row.



As a best-selling author and Hall of Fame professional speaker, Dr. Alan Zimmerman has taught more than one million people in 48 states and 22 countries how to keep a positive attitude on and off the job. In his book, PIVOT: How One Turn In Attitude Can Lead To Success, Dr. Zimmerman outlines the exact steps you must take to get the results you want in any situation. Go to Alan's site.

Servant Leadership

Good day and welcome to Friday. As is our practice, we conclude the week with a short video offering.

This week I was caused to re-visit my 1977 copy of Robert Greenleaf's amazing book "Servant Leadership" as I am preparing a talk for an upcoming seminar. As I was reviewing this wonderful man's seminal work, I was reminded of the outstanding characteristics of the people that it is my pleasure to serve.

As you go into this holiday weekend I feel it is appropriate, and important, that you take a look at what is being shared in this short video. Assess for yourself how you "lead", and as you enter the Fall season, consider the adjustments you need to make to ensure that you are having the impact you desire.

Let me know your thought's about.

Servant Leadership.

Have a wonder-filled holiday weekend.

See you on Tuesday.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

How are you choosing?

As asked by Jacob Roig

Live at least 5 minutes of every day as if it were your last. ~ Jacob Roig

If today were my last day on Earth and I could share 500 words of brilliance with the world, here are the important things I'd want to pass along to others...

Never let anyone or anything stand in your way of what you really want! Brilliant words, but the meaning and lesson behind it made the difference to me in changing my life.

How many times have we settled for the first No? How many times has someone said you cannot and you accepted that answer? How many times have you not done what you wanted or gotten what you wanted because of money? If you are like me, many, many times.

I am inspired by the magic and the ability of setting an intention, finding an obstacle for it helps me realize I have a choice, to let this obstacle stand in my way or to move around the obstacle and get what I want.

For me "I cannot afford it right now" was my big one, other times it was someone who was between me and what I wanted, or lastly it was maybe "I can't do it" or "I am not worthy". In every case I wanted something and did not realize how easily I could be convinced I could not attain or have it. I was usually the one saying I could not have it.

I would tell you this today: to get what you want, to go where you want to go in your life, you must be willing to overcome yourself and the inner voice that says No, But, What if.

What I mean by that is that you never let a No be your stop. If you want something and you say inside you want it but outside you say the time is not right or I cannot afford it right now. It is not about the money! It is about you saying you do not have it and believing that it is the preventer of all you want.

Yes, you will need to pay for it but how do you know you cannot have it or do it? Have you asked the supplier of the product, service or thing if there is a way to work something out? Have you stated out loud what you wanted?

You see, sometimes by stating out loud that I want this, I want this to happen the way to get it presents itself... More often than not, it happens, you get what you want.

We choose everything. We choose to move forward, we choose to settle, we choose to grow, we choose to stay comfortable, we choose to risk or we choose to say this is the best it will be for me.

I choose to acknowledge the bad but choose what's good about it. I choose to see the lessons I am supposed to learn, not to see I made a mistake. I choose to see the beauty in everyone. I choose to live 5 minutes or more of every day as if it were my last. I choose to be aware of my choices. How are you choosing? How do you choose your day, your week, and your life?

Jacob is a successful entrepreneur, the owner of 5 businesses, a prolific writer of poetry, and a certified Mars Venus Business Success Coach.

The Major Key Is You!

By the late Full Spectrum Leader, Jim Rohn

Of all the things that can have an effect on your future, I believe personal growth is the greatest. We can talk about sales growth, profit growth, asset growth, but all of this probably will not happen without personal growth. It's really the open door to having it all... In fact I'd like to have you memorize a most important phrase. Here it is, "The major key to your better future is you!"

Let me repeat that: "The major key to your better future is you

Put that someplace you can see it everyday—in the bathroom, in the kitchen, at the office—anywhere you can see it everyday. "The major key to your better future is you." Try to remember that every day you live and think about it often.
Because the major key is you...

Now, there are many things that will help you create a better future. If you belong to a strong, dynamic, and progressive company, that would help. If the company has good products, and/or good services you are proud of, that would certainly help. If there were good sales aids, that would help, good training would certainly help. If there is strong leadership that will certainly help too...

If your car doesn't break down, that will help. If the kids don't get sick, that will help. If the neighbors stay half way civil, that will help. If your relatives don't bug you, that will help. If it isn't too cold, if it isn't too hot, all those things will help you build a better future. And if prices don't go much higher, and if taxes don't get much heavier, that will help. We could go on and on with the list; but remember this, the list of things that I've just covered and many more—all put together—play only a minor role in your better future.

Because, "The major key to your better
future is you." Lock your mind onto that. This is a very important point to remember. The major key is you. When asked, "How do you develop an above average income?" My mentor Mr. Shoaff always answered by saying, "Simple, become an above average person. Work on you."

Mr. Shoaff would say, "Develop an above average handshake." He would say, "A lot of people want to be successful, and they don't even work on their handshake. As easy as that would be to start, they let it slide. They don't understand." Mr. Shoaff would say, "Develop an above average smile. Develop an above average excitement. Develop an above average dedication. Develop an above average interest in other people." He would say, "To have more, you've got to become more."

Strangely enough, if you take two different people representing the same company, one may earn an extra $500 a month, and the other may earn a $5,000. What could possibly be the difference? If the products were the same, if the training was the same, if they both had the same literature, the same tools. If they both had the same teacher, the same compensation plan, if they both attended the same meetings, why would one person earn the $500 per month and the other person earn the $5,000? The difference is inside, not outside...

It's true... The real difference is inside you. In fact, the difference is you. The magic is not in the products. The magic is not in the literature. The magic is not in the DVD. There isn't a magic meeting... The magic that makes things better is inside you, and personal growth makes this magic work for you.

The magic is in believing. The magic is in daring. The magic is in trying. The real magic is in persevering. The magic is in accepting. It's in working. The magic is in thinking. There is magic in a handshake. There is magic in a smile. There is magic in excitement and determination. There is real magic in compassion and caring and sharing. There is unusual magic in strong feeling and you see, all that comes from inside, not outside. So, the difference is inside you. Because the real difference is you... You are the major key to your better future!

To Your Success, Jim

Life is a Marathon.

Hello there on this lovely summer Friday.

As is usual we end this week with a short video offering. We've worked hard this week and addressed some issues that clearly are important in our day-to-day life experience, and I totally congratulate you.

Imagine leaving work and being greeted by cheers and high fives. In this uplifting video, Amy Krouse and friends, cheered on passengers of the Chicago subway as they exited. Watch as smiles, liveliness and laughter ensue at the terminal, after finishing a day of this marathon we call life.

I think you'll agree with the intention of the message that:

Life is a Marathon!

Have an awesome weekend.

See you on Monday.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

Good Fences Make Us Rich!

I've been thinking about the line from Robert Frost that "good fences make good neighbors." I'm convinced that the most over-looked essential for success is the skill of "good boundaries."

High achievers do one thing at a time. They are focused, determined and persistent (a polite word for stubborn). But more than anything else, success requires that we are not distracted, that we don't waste our time and energy chasing non-essentials. Most of us do too much of that and wonder why we don't achieve more in life.

This week I've had several conversations that brought this home to me. One friend laughed out loud when I asked him to set limits on his work and "just say no" to outrageous demands. He argued that he would lose customers, that he prides himself on responding to his clients and that, "I just couldn't do that." As a result, he works long hours doing trivial things that are "urgent" for other people! He's often exhausted and, of course, he is not building his own business.

I was reminded of Michael Gerber's famous dictum to "work on your business rather than in your business." In my friend's case, my fear is that neither his business nor his life will flourish because he spends so much time and energy on his clients' petty interruptions.

Highly successful people build tight fences around their work. They define what they do, decide what you won't do, and then stick to it.

A second essential is to "fence out" new opportunities. Yes, you read that right. We live in a world of endless opportunities. You can go to school, start a new business, go to China for the Olympics, or buy another house while they're on sale this year. Opportunities abound! Television may be our most common distraction, but I'm convinced having too many opportunities may be our most expensive distraction.

The key to success is to do one thing well. And do a lot of it. And sell it at a price that is a "bargain" for your customers and profitable for you. Failures are always chasing the "next big thing." They are experts at "starting over." Successful people are narrow-minded and they persist. They put good fences around "opportunity."

A final boundary is to put boundaries around our friends and loved ones. This is tough! And, obviously, I'm not talking about putting limits on the quality of our relationships. Love and friendship is what life is all about! But, I don't answer my phone every time it rings.

One of the toughest things in life is to be disciplined about how we balance our relationships and our work. "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy." We all know tragic stories of people who spent their lives working and ended up alone and bitter. Don't do that! In my work, however, I see more instances of people who are so caught up in their friends and family, their community or their hobbies that they fail to focus on their work. That, too, is a failure of boundaries.

We want to be "nice." We value our relationships, and our friends and family are wonderful people. No wonder we want to "put them first." That's a good thing! But so is doing your work, pursuing your passion and building your business. Balance and boundaries are the key.

Robert Frost observed that "good fences make good neighbors" and I would add that good boundaries make us rich, in every sense of the word. Boundaries are essential to build your business, to create and maintain healthy relationships, and to enjoy the life you truly want.

Maintain your boundaries.

Seven Ways the Best Leaders Set an Example by Going First

by Kevin Eikenberry

To lead someone or something means, literally, to be in front, so that others can see and follow in that direction. Stated another way, if you think you are leading, but no one is following, you are just taking a walk.

In yet other words, leaders are leaders because of what they do, not because of a position they hold or the title printed on their business cards. This idea is central to the process of, and having success in, leading others.

This idea holds all of us as leaders accountable for our actions – and it means that “leading by example” is a phrase with too many words. Perhaps the only (and definitely the best) way to lead is “by example.”

So if we are going to lead by example, what are some of the most important examples we can set?

That is the question I want to begin to answer (and get you thinking about) with the rest of this article.

Attitude

Your attitude matters more than everyone else’s. As a leader, they are looking to you, watching for clues and modeling your attitude. Remember that someone must inject the positive attitude, must smile first, and must make it ok to think about problems proactively. If you don’t do it, who else will? If you aren’t doing it, what are you waiting for?

Learning

Every leader wants those they lead to be learning, developing and growing. It is hard to convince them to do so if they don’t see you doing it. If you want others to be learners, you must be one first. Besides, the role of leader is complex enough that there is always something you can learn; always something you can get better at.

Expectations

The expectations you have for others will impact their performance, positively or negatively. Which way will it be? Are you going first by raising your expectation of others so they can build confidence, urgency and discipline to reach those expectations? It won’t happen automatically. Set your expectations of others, let people know you believe in them, then watch them grow!

Change

If you want to affect and implement change you must be a champion of it. If you want the change to be successful, you must lead people towards it. This goes beyond corporate initiatives and major projects. Are you open to trying new things? Are you flexible in your approaches? If you want others to be, remember who they are watching . . .

Trust

If you want to build more trust in your organization – or with specific individuals, you must go first. Offer them trust. Be more trustworthy. Waiting for others to take the lead, could be a long wait. Extend and offer trust first. Occasionally you will get hurt, more often greater trust will build.

Questions

If you want the input of others, stop talking and start asking. Ask questions first. Ask questions often. Good questions promote learning, information clarity and exchange and engagement. If you want these things, stop talking and start asking.

Listening

Certainly, once you ask a question you will be best served by listening to the response. Listening is such an important behavior because it not only allows for information to be successfully shared, but it communicates to the other person that you care about their thoughts, the facts and who they are. For these reasons and many more, listen more!

Setting an example means taking the risk, doing what is necessary, doing what no one else is doing. It means going first.

Where are you going?

WHAT IS PERSONAL MASTERY?

by Karin Leonard

The spring/summer issue of “What is Enlightenment?” magazine compares and contrasts self-mastery with spirituality. Interestingly, the publishers had difficulty finding female professionals in the personal development field willing to use the word “Mastery”. These women felt the term means controlling oneself and others, and would block the process of spiritual unfolding from within. Since I happen to be female, and because I have stood by “Personal Mastery” ( as a column since 1993), I’d like to share a different view.

Master the Process

Practicing the “Kaizen” of Personal Mastery means that you are committed to the continuous improvement of everything you do, in all areas of your life. This is an ongoing journey of learning, where your results reflect feedback for the future, not failure. Moreover, mastery implies that because you value your innate gifts, you set up structures and support in your life, in order to fully and reliably express them. So-called self-discipline, then, is not an act of controlling and punishing yourself, but is motivated by self-love.

Mastery doesn’t block unfolding from within, but catalyzes and sustains it. For some exceptional folks it may be fine to just flow with the spontaneous expression of the self, yet for the rest of us, both inspiration and structure are required. Inspiration alone risks loosing momentum, and structure without spirit crumbles in the dust. In my private practice for example, my clients may engage in deep hypnotic process work, and we also discuss specific daily actions to follow through on the inner shifts that have occurred.

Internal Synergy

“Mastery” does not necessarily imply “controlling” anyone, including oneself. What works over time is to integrate the various and often conflicting aspects of personality. The goal is to get all of you on the same team, working together, instead of internal struggle, sometimes bordering on warfare. For example, you may well be able to make yourself stay away from cigarettes, for a while… But eventually the “control” stops working, and the old habits come back. Unless the reasons why you smoked in the first place are addressed effectively, change is unlikely to last. To develop enduring new good habits, all parts of your being need to be honored and understood, not suppressed and conquered.

Personal Power

As you create internal synergy, your personal power grows, and you then naturally take the driver’s seat to your destiny. This includes assuming complete responsibility for the direction your life is headed. You realize that you can create anything you want, within your circle of influence, and according to your skills, talents and competence. Some say this takes self-discipline. I prefer to use the term personal power, and with that the willingness to be at choice. Real power comes from listening to the stirrings of soul. Becoming who you are meant to be means living in harmony with the mysterious heartbeat of life itself. Unfolding your potential can not be made to happen from the level of ego, it can only be supported by creating the right conditions.

In the end, Personal Mastery is the journey of tapping your full potential as a human being – through being the leader of your life, and by co-creating with the spirit that runs through you.

Are You Ready?

Over this past weekend I said to some very delightful business folks, who were not as far along their 2011 business plan as they would like to be, that between Labor Day and the Xmas break they could fulfill their entire yearly plan. But, only if they were ready!

We get the week kicked off on this very subject by turning to an offering by one of our favorite contributors, and Full Spectrum Leader, Ms. Jan Janzen. I think you’ll like what she has to say.

Are You Ready?

By Jan Janzen

The other day while speaking to my dear friend Peter about what was happening in my life, he used a term that caught my attention. He said, "the issue Jan is IJR." I replied with "what the heck is IJR"? I thought maybe I had missed a new technology term while in Mexico. Quite simply, IJR stands for "Is Jan Ready?"

The conversation after that question was fascinating, perhaps even relevant to what is going on in your life.

Have you noticed that sometimes you don't get what you want? You may have done your vision board, your God jar, your list of what you want in your life and it isn't showing up. You've read the books, done the workshops, and watched The Secret a dozen times.

However, after my conversation with Peter my latest question for my clients is: Are you ready?

Ready for what you want, ready for what you are intending to manifest, ready for all the good things you know you deserve. Are you ready for a larger life, more money, a fabulous relationship, a terrific business, or a new home? Honestly, are you ready for the next step?

I bet that if you really look at what has happened to you over the last five years, life has been a fascinating journey. I know that over five years ago when I started writing this monthly newsletter, life was very different than what it looks like now. However, at the time as I was developing Women Empowering Women in the Vancouver area, I was very clear on my large vision for the empowerment of women. I knew what power women had that just needed focus, leadership and a clear vision to accomplish amazing things in the world. Yet at the same time, as things started to move towards that goal, something didn't feel right. Despite the success at the time, it just wasn't meant to happen. The market was ready, almost frothing at the
mouth for it, but Jan wasn't ready. Women Empowering Women died a most untimely death because I didn't have what I needed to have to do what I dreamt of doing.

Lots of things happened in the meantime - a trip to South Africa that changed my life, a book released, another one now written, a serious relationship with an amazing man, and living in Mexico. And perhaps the most relevant to the journey was a promotion to President of Plexus Pink, the network marketing company that is all about the empowerment of women.

What's fascinating is that I noticed the shift happen earlier this spring. It was like something inside of me clicked. Perhaps as I watched women, no more or less gifted or qualified than me, doing some pretty remarkable things. Maybe it was the blossoming of an ardent desire to find my voice on stage again. Perhaps it was a deep calling that powerful leadership is sorely needed in the world today. Something re-ignited that vision of empowering women. I don't know. I just know that one day, as much as I was arguing for a continued hiatus on the beaches of Mexico, the Universe was calling me to greater callings. I argued - more because I thought I should to just be sure there wasn't a mistake - but I also knew that I was ready.

You may or may not understand what I am describing. You may not yet have that longing in your soul to be larger than you currently are. You may still be wondering when that big picture for you is going to show up or if it even will. Perhaps you don't even want it to as you're in the "rest" phase I spoke about recently and you may even be hoping that rest phase doesn't end.

On the other hand, you could know exactly what I am talking about and you are well on your way. If that's the case, I bet there are some interesting emotions coming up for you. Fear, doubt, anxiety, worry and some trepidation along with the excitement and joy are usually a pretty common mix. Perhaps you are still arguing with the Universe about the calling and doubting whether or not you are ready.

Can I offer a few suggestions? If you aren't feeling a huge calling to some massive project or direction, then relax and enjoy where you are right now. If it's peaceful where you're at, then that's perfect. There is nothing wrong or bad with that. Just ask yourself honestly if you are blocking out a message or shutting out the voice.

If you are getting a message but don't know what to do about it as it doesn't appear particularly clear, there may be a critical step missing. Have you said YES to the Universe? Have you agreed and told the Universe that you are ready? Did you finish the enrollment process or do you still doubt, worry and need to be in control?

One of my clients decided recently to make a major shift in her lifestyle. Tired of the large overhead for a life that no longer suited, Paula and her husband put just about everything with a monthly price tag up for sale. Trailer, truck, horse and house all went on the block as they started looking at ways to simplify their life. However, she mentioned that she recently realized that she hadn't really said YES to selling the ranch. There weren't any nibbles on the property either although everything else had moved out of their life quite nicely. Once Paula and her husband got really clear that they were ready to let go of the ranch there was immediate activity. Real estate agents started calling and a flurry of interest appeared out of nowhere. Isn't that interesting? My client, appreciated that she was experiencing an IPR - Is Paula Ready moment?

The Universe doesn't force us to grow. It doesn't push us into situations that ensure our personal development. It doesn't hold us hostage to our Assignment for this lifetime. It merely provides the vehicles, opportunities, people and situations for us to show up. It promises us the support and guidance, direction and love but we have to take the first steps. We have to partner with the Universe - this isn't a dictatorship.

So have you partnered with the Universe or are you holding back? Have you said YES, I will do whatever it takes to be everything I am here to be? Are you willing to be open to a different vehicle or venue than you thought was most likely. Interestingly, three of my long-term clients discovered recently that what I saw for them very clearly more than a year ago has come full circle for the second time. The first time they started down the path I suggested, they pulled back, uncertain and afraid. Of course the Universe gave them the breathing room and continued to support them until they were ready the next time it showed up. Sure enough, all three of them are moving into amazing Assignments that are big, powerful, potentially lucrative, and feel right for them at a soul level. Twelve months ago, 18 months ago, 24 months ago, they weren't ready. Today they are, and the Universe and I are celebrating their progress.

How can you get ready if you aren't but want to be? Look at what is really holding you back. Are you afraid of failure? Are you afraid of success? Is it showing up differently than you thought so there is some stubbornness or pride getting in the way? Are you feeling impatient? I know that I personally didn't want the responsibility, the commitment and the workload that goes with this Assignment...until now. Today as I am on a flight to spend the next
few weeks in Phoenix, I am energized by the Assignment. I am constantly rising to the challenges with passion, feel a calmness despite the stress and am excited about the future. My vision for a powerful network of women is alive and strong. It is simply through a different vehicle than I would ever have thought. But I honestly didn't feel this way just 9 months ago.

So know that the Universe may be ready and you may not be or you may be ready and the Universe is still lining up the parties. Relax and continue to say YES. Do your part and I promise you the Universe will do its part. Just be sure you are doing your part 100% - nothing held back, no reserves for the "just in case it doesn't work" scenario. Give it your all and see what happens.

Right now, ask yourself if you're ready. Put your initial into the IJR question and then be honest with yourself. It may give you some critical answers about your life.

To your outrageous success,

Jan

Jan Janzen is an amazing contributor and you can get to know her better at: www.janjanzen.com

Full Spectrum Leadership in Action!

Good day and welcome to the weeks end, and what a week it has been. We've pushed hard, tackled issues, seen breakthrough's, and saw leadership in action all over the place. Congratulations.

As is our usual way, we end the week with a short video. As I research video offerings to share with you, I am most struck with the ones that reflect for me Full Spectrum Leadership in action. And boy, does today's video do just that.

As principal of Loreto School in Calcutta, Irish Catholic nun Sister Cyril has worked some real-world miracles. Her school serves 1,500 female students, of which 721 are so poor that they need food, medicine, and even money to meet the rent. By bringing children together like this, she is showing a way for middle class schools to integrate the poor living around them into their educational mainstream, to their mutual benefit.

When Sister Cyril was awarded the Padmashri, India's highest civilian award, for having served over 450,000 street children, she was asked about her message to people. She immediately responded: "Give what you have received freely and the reward is hundred-fold."

Think about your contribution this weekend.



Have a thought-full weekend.

See you on Monday.

I appreciate you.

~peter~

12 Ways to Get a Second Chance in Life

Good day to you and welcome to Thursday.

I was having a chuckle yesterday with one of our readers when she called me to say that our contributions this week have been causing her to work harder that she imagined when she started subscribing to our little adventure. She related that she thought this initiative would give her a few little soft tips for living life better, but what she's found that this is indeed a Masters course in Full Spectrum Leadership. I was was doing jazz hands when I heard that.

If folks are looking for a nice soft cuddly duddly pillowed invitation to live life to the fullest, there are many options out there on the "net" for that. Here we actually get the job done.

I've been saving today's missive for the end of the week, oh I know, it's only Thursday. We always bring in a video on Friday and today's reader is one that might as well print off and spend time with over the weekend. You'll see why.

Many folks only need one, however today you get:

12 Ways to Get a Second Chance in Life

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning,
but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
-Maria Robinson

We all need second chances. This isn’t a perfect world. We’re not perfect people. I’m probably on my 1000th second chance right now and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Because even though I’ve failed a lot, it means I’ve tried a lot too.

We rarely get things right the first time. Almost every major accomplishment in a person’s life starts with the decision to try again and again – to get up after every failed attempt and give it another shot.

The only difference between an opportunity and an obstacle is attitude. Getting a second chance in life is about giving yourself the opportunity to grow beyond your past failures. It’s about positively adjusting your attitude toward future possibilities. Here’s how:

1. Let go of the past.

What’s done is done. When life throws us nasty curveballs it typically doesn’t make any sense to us, and our natural emotional reaction might be to get extremely upset and scream obscenities at the top of our lungs. But how does this help our dilemma? Obviously, it doesn’t.

The smartest, and oftentimes hardest, thing we can do in these kinds of situations is to be more tempered in our reactions. To want to scream obscenities, but to wiser and more disciplined than that. To remember that emotional rage only makes matters worse. And to remember that tragedies are rarely as bad as they seem, and even when they are, they give us an opportunity to grow stronger.

Every difficult moment in our lives is accompanied by an opportunity for personal growth and creativity. But in order to attain this growth and creativity, we must first learn to let go of the past. We must recognize that difficulties pass like everything else in life. And once they pass, all we’re left with are our unique experiences and the lessons required two make a better attempt next time.

2. Identify the lesson.

Everything is a life lesson. Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, etc. They’re all part of the learning experience we call ‘life.’

Never forget to acknowledge the lesson, especially when things don’t go yourway. If you don’t get a job you wanted or a relationship doesn’t work, it only means something better is out there waiting. And the lesson you just learned is the first step towards it.

3. Lose the negative attitude.

Negative thinking creates negative results. Positive thinking creates positive results. Period.

Every one of the other suggestions in this article is irrelevant if your mind is stuck in the gutter. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. The mind must believe it can do something before it is capable of actually doing it. For some practical positive thinking guidance I recommend reading The Power of Positive Thinking.

4. Accept accountability for your current situation.

Either you take accountability for your life or someone else will. And when they do, you’ll become a slave to their ideas and dreams instead of a pioneer of your own.

You are the only one who can directly control the outcome of your life. And no, it won’t always be easy. Every person has a stack of obstacles in front of them. You must take accountability for your situation and overcome these obstacles. Choosing not to is giving up.

5. Focus on the things you can change.

Some forces are out of your control. The best thing you can do is do the best with what’s in front of you with the resources you do have access to.

Wasting your time, talent and emotional energy on things that are beyond your control is a recipe for frustration, misery and stagnation. Invest your energy in the things you can change.

6. Figure out what you really want.

You’ll be running on a hamster wheel forever if you never decide where you want to go. Figure out what’s meaningful to you so you can be who you were born to be.

Some of us were born to be musicians – to communicate intricate thoughts and rousing feelings with the strings of a guitar. Some of us were born to be poets – to touch people’s hearts with exquisite prose. Some of us were born to be entrepreneurs – to create growth and opportunity where others saw rubbish. And still, some of us were born to be or do whatever it is, specifically, that moves you.

Don’t quit just because you didn’t get it right on your first shot. And don’t waste your life fulfilling someone else’s dreams and desires. You must follow your intuition and make a decision to never give up on who you are capable of becoming.

7. Eliminate the non-essential.

First, identify the essential – the things in your life that matter most to you. Then eliminate the fluff. This drastically simplifies things and leaves you with a clean slate – a fresh, solid foundation to build upon without needless interferences. This process works with any aspect of your life – work projects, relationships, general to-do lists, etc.

Remember, you can’t accomplish anything if you’re trying to accomplish everything. Concentrate on the essential. Get rid of the rest. The Joy of Less is a great read on this topic.

8. Be very specific.

When you set new goals for yourself, try to be as specific as possible. “I want to lose twenty pounds” is a goal you can aim to achieve. “I want to lose weight” is not. Knowing the specific measurements of what you want to achieve is the only way you will ever get to the end result you desire.

Also, be specific with your actions too. “I will exercise” is not actionable. It’s far too vague. “I will take a 30 minute jog every weekday at 6PM” is something you can actually do – something you can build a routine around – something you can measure.

9. Concentrate on DOING instead of NOT DOING.

“Don’t think about eating that chocolate donut!” What are you thinking about now? Eating that chocolate donut, right? When you concentrate on not thinking about something, you end up thinking about it.

The same philosophy holds true when it comes to breaking our bad habits. By relentlessly trying not to do something, we end up thinking about it so much that we subconsciously provoke ourselves to cheat – to do the exact thing we are trying not to do.

Instead of concentrating on eliminating bad habits, concentrate on creating good habits (that just happen to replace the bad ones). For instance, if you’re trying to eliminate snacking on junk food, you might create a new mental habit like this: “At 3PM each day, about the time I’m usually ready for a snack, I will eat five whole wheat crackers.” After a few weeks or months of concentrating on this good habit it will become part of your routine. You’ll start doing the right thing without even thinking about it.

10. Create a daily routine.

It’s so simple, but creating a daily routine for yourself can change your life. The most productive routines, I’ve found, come at the start and end of the day – both your workday and your day in general. That means, develop a routine for when you wake up, for when you first start working, for when you finish your work, and for the hour or two before you go to sleep.

Doing so will help you start each day on point, and end each day in a way that prepares you for tomorrow. It will help you focus on the important stuff, instead of the distractions that keep popping up. And most importantly, it will help you make steady progress – which is what second chances are all about.

11. Maintain self-control and work on it for real.

The harder you work the luckier you will become. Stop waiting around for things to work out. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.

While many of us decide at some point during the course of our lives that we want to answer our calling, only an astute few of us actually work on it. By “working on it,” I mean truly devoting oneself to the end result. The rest of us never act on our decision. Or, at best, we pretend to act on it by putting forth an uninspired, half-assed effort.

If you want a real second chance, you’ve got to be willing to give it all you got. No slacking off! This means you have to strengthen and maintain your self-control. The best way I’ve found to do this is to take one small bite of the elephant at a time. Start with just one activity, and make a plan for how you will deal with troubles when they arise. For instance, if you’re trying to lose weight, come up with a list of healthy snacks you can eat when you get the craving for snacks. It will be hard in the beginning, but it will get easier. And that’s the whole point. As your strength grows, you can take on bigger challenges.

Remember, life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Achieving your dreams can be a lot of work, even the second time around. Be ready for it. Read Getting Things Done for some practical guidance in this arena.

12. Forget about impressing people, ANYONE!

So many people buy things they don’t need with money they don’t have to impress people they don’t know. Or some variation thereof…

Don’t be one of these people. It’s a waste of time. And it’s probably one of the reasons you need a second chance in the first place.

Just keep doing what you know is right. And if it doesn’t work, adjust your approach and try again. You’ll get there eventually.

10 Steps for Making a Major Life Change

Good day to you on yet another beautiful summer day.

So, right to work today. I've been having some feedback from some folks who feel that my notes to you are becoming a bit repetitive in their theme. Yes they are, and here's why.

The proposition I have for you is about FULL SPECTRUM LEADERSHIP! Not recipes for your bbq, or details on how to wax your car, or even about how to write a great novel. This is all about how YOU lead YOU.

This spinning orb is chronically short of conscious leadership, and my stated position of "You can't give away what you don't own", clearly denotes that we must lead ourselves before we can ever position to lead someone else. If you think I'm beginning to sound like a broken record, all I suggest is for you to: Hum Along!

Get some ice cream today.

~peter~

So, today's a work day, and you get it going greater by employing:

10 Steps for Making a Major Life Change
by Steve Davis

As human beings, we're creatures of habit. No wonder making a major life change is so hard! But it can be done. Follow these steps to get your change in motion, one easy step at a time:

1. Identify the price of maintaining the status quo.
Not making the change you know you need to make is costing you. Do some soul searching; consult with trusted allies, or journal to yourself to uncover the payoffs you're receiving, and the prices you're paying for maintaining the status quo. When you get that the price of not making the change is greater than the payoff, you'll be more committed to moving forward.

2. Create a reserve of everything.
We don't always have to make a difficult change from where we are now. If we have issues with money, time, space, emotional support, skills, etc., make a plan now to get more than you need in these areas, creating a stronger foundation from which to launch in your new direction. Keep in mind that it's better to be over prepared and arrive at your destination than to fail because you were just a hair short of having what you needed to get there.

3. Forgive self-judgments.
Guilt is rampant in our culture. So is the vendetta against selfishness. Suffering is supported and nurtured by friends, family, religions, etc. So it's not surprising that many of us, deep down, don't feel we deserve to have what we want. For example, maybe you feel you're not good enough or deserving of the life you really want. Or maybe you feel that the change you're about to make will hurt someone close to you. Or you may feel that you're not smart enough, resourceful enough, bold enough, or just plain "enough" to make this change. Acknowledge these judgments then forgive yourself for holding these false perceptions about who you really are. Because the truth is, they are only ideas, many of which are irrational, and you will create yourself each moment based on the new idea you hold about who you are.

4. Stop complaining.
Are you complaining about being in the situation you're in? Are you blaming others? Or have you accepted full responsibility for your situation and just beat yourself up for not making the change? If any of the above are true, you are playing the victim and you're forfeiting your power to make the change you say you want. Even if you're blaming yourself for not being happy or for not having the courage to make the change, then part of you is beating up on another part of yourself, hence there's a victim in there somewhere. To the degree you play the role of victim, you lose power you could be using to move forward. So get behind yourself completely and own your full power to create the life you desire, no matter what.

5. Give up analysis that breeds paralysis.
We are so conditioned to figure things out before we leap, that sometimes we become paralyzed to take the actions our bodies are directed to take from the beginning. This is particularly true if you're an engineer, scientist, or other type of technical person who experiences the world more through analysis than through feeling. If you're stuck in a thinking pattern rehashing the same ideas over and over, trying to figure out what will happen if, then you're stuck in a mind-loop. It's time to quit thinking and start doing. Feel in your body what it wants to do, then just do it! The information you're seeking may only be available after you take action anyway. Wisdom often comes from experience, not from analysis.

6. Develop a compelling vision.
Leaving a longstanding relationship or a long time career can be very frightening. This is because if what we have is all we see, then to give it up means we'll have nothing left. This is a terrible illusion. New opportunities, relationships, resources, connections, and ideas always rush in to fill space in our lives.

But first, you have to make the space for something new, and second, create a clear vision of what your life will look like once your change is complete. The vision of your new future eliminates the fear of the unknown--which can keep you stuck for a long time! Your vision will form the matrix on which you will create your new life and give you the inspiration and courage you need to move on.

7. Risk failure.
Does your fear of failing keep you stuck? If so, define what failure looks like to you. Imagine the worst possible thing happening. Can you live with that? Can you make course corrections before it happens or after it happens? The answer is almost always "yes." So, please, do yourself a favor, remove the word "failure" from your vocabulary. Realize that each action simply yields a result--one you want or one you don't want. Use this as feedback from the universe and take the next logical step. From this perspective, mistakes are just indications of a course correction and not to be taken personally. Pilots are checking their compass all the time and making course corrections based on this feedback. They'd never get anywhere if they took every off-course reading as a personal failure. Give up the concept of failure and take flight!

8. Recruit your inner warrior.
Within each of us there is an instinctual aspect built for bold, decisive action. It looks out, not only for our survival, but also for our soul's mission. It sends messages in the form of feelings in your body. They may come as "gut" feelings, or just a sense of "knowing" that has no rational foundation. If you're facing a difficult change, and have "contemplated" yourself into a corner, it may be time to let your inner warrior take over for a while. Just act “as if” you "know" what to do, then do it without thinking about it until after it's done.

9. Get support to help you through the change.
Big life changes can be overwhelming. There's no shame in asking for help from friends, relatives, or from a coach. In fact, enough of the right kind of support can make a seemingly difficult change, relatively easy. For me, being a former lone-ranger, asking for and accepting help from others was difficult at first, but really nice once I got used to it. Now I wouldn't think of starting a major project or making a big change without relying on my support system of close and loving friends, and my coach. Do whatever is necessary to make change easy on yourself. You're worth it!

10. Don't go to your deathbed wondering what would have happened if...
It's easy for us to forget how short our lives really are. Many of us live as if we'll never die. We waste away our hours and days working jobs we hate, living just for the weekends, or "putting in time" until retirement, living most of our lives like zombies. We may live in a relationship that is draining and disempowering thinking it might magically get better somehow, someday. We deny our feelings or make excuses for frittering our lives away. This is insane. Stop it now! Our lives are so precious and so short. I challenge you to project yourself forward to your death. It's real and it's coming for you! See yourself on your deathbed and ask yourself if the life you're living now is all you dreamt it to be. Write your own obituary today. How close are you to living your passion?

Let this vision be a motivator to get off your butt and follow your dreams!

 

Steve Davis, M.A., M.S., is an Facilitator's Coach, Infoprenuer, and free-lance human, helping facilitators, organizational leaders, educators, trainers, coaches and consultants present themselves confidently, access their creativity, empower their under-performing groups, enhance their facilitation skills, and build their business online and offline. Does leading or participating in groups frustrate you? Subscribe to the free weekly ezine for group leaders at http://www.MasterFacilitatorJournal.com.

The Gift That is Your Life!

Good day to you on this lovely summer Tuesday.

It's often brought to my attention by lovely folks who read this blog that there appears to be a commonality in the theme of many of the notes we share. Yes, it's absolutely true, there is a theme that we build on.

We are uncompromising in the position that Full Spectrum Leadership of our own life starts with taking 100% responsibility for our entire life experience. No excuses, none, nada, zip!

We are very fortunate that we have over 200 amazing writers and contributors who support us in this position, who lovingly share their insights and awareness's with us from an open heart. Today is no different.

Our friend, writer, coach, all round Full Spectrum Leader, and fellow "Pegger" Kim Malchuk brings focus to:

The Gift That is Your Life!

Kim Malchuk

Is having the rug pulled out from under you such a terrible thing? Do you have to hit your own personal rock bottom before you start to understand what is important in life?

Nobody is immune to receiving the hard knocks in life. Turbulent times are not given to us as punishments. They're signs presented to us to perhaps change the course of our life. I want to share with you the lessons I've learned while navigating through the rough waters of my life.

Finger pointing is a waste of energy. It's easy to blame others for our lot in life because looking inward requires energy, honesty and taking ownership for our choices. When I set out to make changes in my life, I focused solely on me and let others fend for themselves.

WOW! What a difference. When I started taking responsibility for my choices and stopped finger pointing, the rough waters turned calm and still. The journey became much smoother.

Words are very powerful so choose them wisely. The most important conversations that we have daily are the ones that we have with ourselves. By choosing words that are positive and encouraging as opposed to negative and destructive we walk with more confidence and pride.

Life seems much easier when we are the cheerleader in our minds instead of the school-yard bully who insists on keeping us down and out. When our thoughts are working with us instead of against us... the possibilities are endless.

Leave the past exactly where it was meant to stay. We are not that powerful to go back in time to change the past. Then why do we focus so much effort on something that is impossible to change? We are in control of what can happen NOW.

If we want to make room for new things to enter into our today's, then we must make room by saying goodbye to our yesterdays. The past takes up valuable real estate in our lives and prevents so many of us from building a priceless future.

Be thankful and grateful for it all. We often think that we get the short end of the stick in life, but look around. If you are reading this right now, be thankful you can see. If something you have read resonates with you, be grateful that your mind is open and willing to learn. If you are keeping a roof over your head, groceries in your home, friends and family who love and support you, think about those who have none of that.

There is so much to be grateful for if we only take the time to look. Slow down and take advantage of the precious gift of time.

Love is the answer. It starts with loving yourself and only overflows to others. It gives you the ability to grow, share and experience the beauty that life has to offer each and every one of us. Be open and receptive to receive this gift whenever it comes your way.

 

Kim Malchuk was born in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, the youngest of seven children. Although her early years were infused with fear, her spirits were buoyed by her dreams of a brighter future. In 2005, Kim lost the love of her life, Mel, to cancer, a cruel but essential teacher in her life's journey.

Choosing to persevere with courage and hope, Kim soon recognized the role our thoughts play in governing the course of our lives. Her inspirational book Tasting Rain puts these life lessons to the test with charming wisdom, wit and authenticity.

Kim enjoys athletics, the outdoors and skydiving. She lives in Winnipeg, Canada and has found her "inspired purpose" in life as a writer, motivational coach and inspirational public speaker.
Kim's website is: tastingrainbook.com
Recent Books: Tasting Rain

Stop Waiting For a Big “Eureka” Moment!

by Art Markman

Bust Your Innovation Myths

It is common to tell stories of great discoveries. Hundreds of years later, we still talk about Galileo Galilei dropping balls of different weights off the Leaning Tower of Pisa to shatter existing beliefs about the way objects fall. Textbooks tell the story of Sir Isaac Newton being struck by an apple and having a sudden insight about gravity. We learn about an inspired Charles Darwin developing a new theory evolution while watching finches on the Galápagos Islands.

The problem with these stories glorifying eureka moments is that — most of the time — they are not true.

In the book Science Secrets, my colleague Alberto Martinez, University of Texas science historian, roots through primary source documents to tease apart fact and fiction in these myths. For example, Martinez points out that 16th-century Italian historian Benedetto Varchi mentions tests of the idea that heavier objects do not fall proportionally faster than light objects in 1544 — twenty years before Galileo was born. Moreover, contrary to usual claims, Galileo later reported that objects of different weights fall at different speeds!

Corporate cultures also tend to create stories about important events in the life of a company. Individuals within a company are held up as heroes who championed key ideas, fought bureaucracies, and instituted significant changes. Similarly, other people and projects are put forward as examples of key failures. In a recent New Yorker article, Malcolm Gladwell describes the development of the desktop operating system that is now so familiar in Apple and Windows computers. He analyzes myths related to the idea that Xerox PARC (which initially developed a version of that operating system) had all of the ideas that were ultimately incorporated in the highly successful Macintosh computer, but failed to capitalize on them. Steve Jobs had to add quite a bit of insight about users when adapting the desktop operating system for a mass audience.

We often try to learn from these stories of success and failure. We seek the business equivalents of Galileo, Newton, and Darwin — legendary figures who will discover innovative ideas that will revolutionize an industry. It has become trite to repeat George Santayana's quote that those people who do not learn history are doomed to live it again. However, by learning from myths rather than history, we may be doomed to fail by repeating a history that never was.

The key lesson here is that discovery myths are slanted to focus on great people and decisive events, so people can better relate to them. But by focusing on the individuals, we ignore both the contribution of others who played a role in a new idea, as well as contemporary culture at the time of the innovation. Often, there are many people toying with similar ideas, and it is the collective work of a community that gives rise to real innovation.

As Isaac Newton himself once said, "If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants" (a statement that wasn't even originally his).

In addition, important ideas develop over time. It is rare that there is a decisive event that triggers significant change. Instead, new ideas typically emerge through discussion, argument, and rigorous testing. The physicist J. J. Thomson is often credited with discovering the electron in 1897. As Martinez points out, though, the actual development of the idea of the electron emerged through the collective efforts of a scientific community over a period of more than 20 years.

In order to truly learn the lessons that corporate history has to teach us, it is important to act like historians. When a new idea or innovation comes to fruition, dig into the details of how it actually emerged. Talk directly to people who were involved in the development of the ideas. Read reports written at the time those ideas were being created. Do not wait for a great person to champion a key idea in a decisive moment. Instead, create an organizational culture in which a community works together to nurture emerging ideas.

Art Markman, PhD, is the Annabel Irion Worsham Centennial Professor of Psychology and Marketing at the University of Texas at Austin. He is currently editor of the journal Cognitive Science, and consults regularly through his company Maximizing Mind. Follow him on twitter @abmarkman.